ƒnƒCƒ‰ƒCƒg‚Í"A bonehead move."

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How I met your mother ƒV[ƒYƒ“9yŒ´‘čzBedtime Stories

As I departed, having bid this busty babe buh-bye, I stopped and looked around,

Where the hell am I?

The sign read 22nd Street, and my concern decreased until a cold wind blew a branch aside,East.

The East Side. No. Wh-What have I done?

I stammered with chagrin. Just then a black sedan pulled up...

stammer Œű‚˛‚ŕ‚é chagrin ‚­‚â‚ľ‚ł

You Barney?

Yeah.

Get in.

Is any of this true?

Of course. Now, hang on to your chayers. For that day I was called before... the High Council of Players.

Gentlemen, for your attendance here, our deepest thanks. I'm sad to say, this council has a poacher in its ranks.

council •]‹c‰ď poacher N“üŽŇ

For Barney here picked up a girl outside his territory. The East Side is Tuxedo Charlie's turf. He's mad.

turf “žˆÓ•Ş–ě

True story. The Agreement of 2004 quite clearly did define Fifth Avenue to be our hunting grounds' dividing line. Your West Side college girls are not the slip I park my boat in. So you should know my East Side debutantes are quite verboten.

Members of the council... Bros... nobody wants a war. Of course I've not forgotten the agreement of '04. What can I say? A bonehead move. Defend it? I'm not able. But, bros, have I not been a bro to each bro at this table? My friend from Brooklyn, Pickle Jar Bob, will give some validation. Remember that young tourist who was looking for Penn Station? She'd just come in from Boston, had a wicked good-in-bed look. I gave her bad directions and she ended up in Red Hook.

bonehead move ‹đ‚Š‚ČŽč’i

Shut up, Barney.

Whoa, Bronx Donnie, let's not get excited.

Tuxedo Charlie's not the only one here who's been slighted. You told her you were Jeter in your quest to lie upon her. Impersonating Yankees is my thing. Have you no honor?

Gentlemen, please, let's not blow this detente to smithereens.

Council recognizes Captain Bill, our bro from Queens.

Thank you. You all know me, and you all respect my game. I dress up like a pilot and meet girls in baggage claim. And on my long-ass subway ride from 61st and Woodside, I came up with a plan to keep you each other's good side. Barney, you have wronged these two. So, for the game they're losing, you now must grant them each a West Side hottie of their choosing.

You're kidding. That's the settlement? Come on, that's rather silly.

Gentlemen, what say you?

I want Robin.

I want Lily.

Please. Bronx Donnie? No chance he could get me in the sack. Tell that Mafioso I know something he can whack.

Ladies, don't you worry, your fair legs can all stay closed. 'Cause luckily they took the counteroffer I proposed.

Well, gentlemen, it seems there's nothing I can say to sway you. Charlie, Donnie, say no more, I gladly will repay you. Carlotta, some champagne. Let's toast before we all adjourn. To boobies. Oh, and B-T-dub, y'all just drank poison. Ha-burn.

And thus, my friends, I have become, through methods somewhat gory the Player King of New York City. Boom. The end. True story.

Well, that was great. Your little story tickled all our ribs. But one mistake you made, sir, was forgetting to call dibs.

No! Not fair. But I'm the king. And such a better dresser.

Sorry, dude, but that's revenge for Lisa the professor.

Let's have another round.

Yes.

Your mommy said. And so we had one. The night wore on, and I must say, it wasn't a half bad one. What memories. Our young and happy hearts were hot as fire. Feels like a lifetime since those days.

Sorry, folks, flat tire.

Oh, come on.

Now I'm never gonna make it to Nantucket.

Oh, look a fireworks display. Some rockets red glare action.

Thank God. Thought my glaucoma drops were causing a reaction.

Marvin, I'm so sorry this whole journey's been a bummer. Soon you'll be right back in Mommy's arms, as warm as summer. But sadly while your troubles stop once we get to the inn the moment we arrive is when my troubles will begin. Sometimes daddies screw up, sometimes mommies get upset. I really hope this weekend is a memory you'll forget. So look up at those fireworks, enjoy the falling embers...

And that, kids, is the very first thing your cousin Marvin remembers.

Gentlemen and ladies, it'll be an hour or so... before the truck gets here to give our broken bus a tow. So in the meantime I suggest we all get nice and cozy. We're gonna be here for a while. Uh, ring-around-the-rosy?

Yeah!

How far do you suppose it is to the Farhampton Inn?

I'd say about five miles away.

Oh, no.

What's with the grin?

Then Marshall looked up heavenward, and swore by night's first star five simple words he'd soon regret.

I can walk that far.

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