Barney, do you have to bite your nails so loud?
I'm not biting my nails.I'm trying to suck the leftover nicotine out of my fingertips.
Marshall, can you pass the onion rings?
What, you got dinosaur arms? They're right here.
What do you think cigarettes are doing right now? You think they're thinking about us?
Dude, if you don't stop tapping your foot, it's coming off.
Oh, my God, Ted, I'm so sorry.Maybe I should move it a little bit closer to your ass!
I am ready to do this right now!
None of us knew what we were fighting about.We just knew we wanted to smoke, more than anything in the world.
It wasn't going very well for Robin, either.
Sorry I'm late.Someone used the microwave, and the elevator stopped.What are you doing?
Okay, Don.Don, seriously, not tonight.Okay, I'm a little bit on edge because I quit smoking for my interview with the mayor, so just
on edge イライラして
Oh! Oh, you precious little porcelain unicorn, you.Why would you do that?
Why? Because I care, Don.I care about the show, I care about my career.Unlike you, you unprofessional jerk! You're sloppy, you're rude, and I wish you worked half as hard as the elastic on those stretched-out underpants.
I'm starting to feel like this is getting a little personal.
No, Don, it would be getting personal if I would say that the reason you bounce from market to market is because you're a loser.A lazy, obnoxious loser.
bounce 去る obnoxious 不愉快な
The mayor canceled.In five, four, three, two
In five, four, three, two
Hi, I'm Robin Scherbatsky.
You think I'm a loser? You're right.I'm a loser.But at least I've accepted it.
A plucky raccoon has been cheering up patients at a local senior center.
plucky 勇気ある raccoon アライグマ
I used to be just like that.Always wanting more and never getting it.It's a dead end, Robin.You're never going to be a network anchor.Just like you're never going to quit smoking.
What are you doing?
I'm enjoying a cigarette.Oh! That'll get you there.That's good.You want a drag?
Can we be professionals?
Please? Yeah.Professionals? You know who's working the camera right now? A chair.We're on a show where we can't even get the cameraman to watch.That's why the mayor canceled, Robin.And that's why Mike is on a fried chicken run.And that's why you and I can enjoy a cigarette right here on the air.
No, thank you.
Why? Because of our millions and millions of impressionable viewers? Okay.If any impressionable viewers have a problem with this, please give us a call.The number's on the screen.Chirp, chirp? Chirp, chirp? Come on, Robin, live a little.Oh, that must be Mike.He always forgets, extra crispy.Hello?
Robin, don't smoke that cigarette!
We're all watching and we're all very impressionable.And I swear to God, if you smoke that cigarette, we're all going to smoke.
You guys are watching?
We sure are, sweetheart, and you look fabulous.
Oh, you guys.
You don't have to do this, Robin.You don't have to smoke.
Resist it, honey.
Thanks for the call, guys.
She did it!
Good for her.
We're not going to smoke.
I have a pack stashed up on the roof.
I'm awake.And I'm smoking! Robin, you know how dangerous it is to wake a sleep-smoker? Dear God.
It's fine.I bought a pack on my way home.
Hey, great show, Robin.
Yeah, but that Don guy, what a tool.
Well, no, he actually apologized to me.
No, I mean when he stood up.Those briefs were pretty revealing.You should date that guy.
Yeah.Not in this lifetime.
They were dating within three months, but more on that later.
Hey, guys, look, the sun's coming up.
You know what right now is a perfect time for? A last cigarette ever.No, I mean, a real last cigarette ever.
Damn it, let's do it.
Okay.All right.Last cigarette ever on the count of three.
One two three.
We all quit for a while after that, but it wasn't anyone's last cigarette.We did eventually all quit smoking for real.Robin's last cigarette was in June, 2013.Barney's last cigarette was in March, 2017.Lily's last cigarette was the day she started trying to get pregnant.And Marshall's last cigarette was the day his son was born.And my last cigarette? Two weeks into dating your mother.And I never looked back.
I'm sorry I hit you, buddy.I wanted to make it up to you by giving you this.
Wow, she's hot!
Yeah.Well, some day, you're going to marry her.
We're pretty lucky.
I'll be in my tent.
Oh, no.Wait, hey! No, don't do that.Well Have fun for me.