Man: Hello. May I speak with a Mr. Ted Mosby?
Man: Mr. Mosby, how you doing, sir? Bob Rorschach over here at Love Solutions. You signed up for our services about six months ago.
Ted: Uh, yeah. You guys never found me a match.
Bob: Right. Well... actually, that's why I'm calling. We found her, sir. We found your soul mate.
Ted: I don't understand. What happened to Ellen Pierce? Doesn't she run this place?
Bob: Well, my firm bought out the company. You know, we're a high-end meats and textiles conglomerate, but the geniuses at corporate decided they wanted to diversify, so... here I am.
textile 繊維 conglomerate 複合企業 diversify 多角化する
Ted: So I'm in good hands. You found me a match?
in good hands 信頼できる人に任せて
Bob: There she is. Your soul mate. That'll be 500 bucks.
Ted: No way. The last time I did this, the girl turned out to be engaged.
Bob: She's not engaged. She's your soul mate. Just read the file.
Narator: So I read the file. And by God, this woman was perfect. She liked dogs, she spent her summers in North Carolina, she played bass guitar, she did the Times crossword, she played tennis, she liked old movies, her favorite food was lasagna, her favorite book was Love in the Time of Cholera, her favorite singer was Otis Redding and she wanted two kids-- a boy and a girl.
Ted: All right, fine. Set it up.
Marshall: You wanted to see me, so I guess that means we're talking again?
Barney: Will you taste this latte for me? I think they gave me decaf.
Marshall: Tastes normal to me.
Barney: That's what I thought, too. Then I got this e-mail from Butterfield.
Marshall: Oh, God!
Barney: It got me as well.
Marshall: Well, then why did you have me drink it?!
Barney: Because now... you're in.
Marshall: Okay. Don't think I'm overlooking the obvious fact that I should just be mad at you. But Executive Mischief Consultant Marshall Eriksen reporting for duty. Let's make that bastard pay. You think that we should brush our teeth first?
overlook 見落とす be mad at 〜に対して腹を立てる duty 義務
Barney: Yeah, it's probably a good idea.
Narator: So that night I had a blind date with my perfect match. I was so excited, I got there early. But before it even started...
Lily: Hey, Ted, are you busy?
Ted: Um... yes.
Lily: Oh, right. Soul mate. Forgot. Listen, could you take a cab out to Dutchess County and change a flat on Marshall's Fiero?
Ted: What? What? No. Can't you just call Marshall?
Lily: Marshall can't know about this. Look, Ted, it's dark, I don't know how to change a tire, and I've stumbled into the beginning of a very scary campfire story. Can you please hurry?
stumble よろめく 遭遇する scary 恐ろしい
Ted: I can't, I'm waiting...
Lily: Oh, my God, is that a drifter with a hook for a hand? No, drifter, no!
Ted: Come on, Lily.
Lily: But you see my point.
Ted: All right, stay there. I'm on my way.
Narator: And so, one $90 cab ride later, I was in the middle of nowhere.
Lily: Oh, thank God. I'm so sorry about this. Did you get ahold of your date?
Lily: And was she okay about pushing it back?
push back 延期する、先送りする
Ted: Yes. Because she's perfect. So what am I doing here?
Lily: You can never tell Marshall.
Ted: I won't.
Lily: Ever. Swear. Swear on the lives of your unborn boy and girl.
Ted: I swear on Luke and Leia.
Lily: About a month ago, I started getting insomnia. Marrying Marshall had been all I wanted for a long time. But, now that it was really happening, it seemed kind of huge and scary.
Ted: Did you talk to Marshall about it?
Lily: He wouldn't have understood. He's not exactly nervous about tying the knot. So I spent my nights reading, painting, setting the high score on Super Bomber Man...
tying the knot 婚姻関係を結ぶ
Ted: That was you? Awesome!
Lily: I know! I just got in the zone and... Not the point of the story. And then I started thinking about Victoria and how she followed her dream to Germany, and I found that art fellowship.
Ted: Let me guess. It's somewhere far away.
Lily: San Francisco. But it's not like I'm going to do it. The dates conflict with the wedding. But I love painting, and I've always wondered if I'm any good. This was a way to find out. And the interview is tonight. In New Haven.
Ted: You don't want to get married.
Lily: Of course I want to get married. I... It's not like I was ever going to do it. I just... I just really wanted to see if I could get this.
Ted: Lily, we live in the center of art and culture in America. I'm sure you could find a program here that's just as selective. But you chose one in a city 3,000 miles away, and you didn't tell Marshall. I think it's pretty clear what that means.
Lily: Okay, I was... I was having second thoughts. But I'm not any more. I... I mean, this flat tire was a sign. I'm not supposed to do this. I'm supposed to go home and-and be with Marshall. You must think I'm so stupid.
Ted: I don't think you're stupid.
Lily: I love Marshall.
Ted: I know you do. Come here. It's okay. Look... Marriage is big. You're allowed to freak out.
freak out 訳の分からないことを言う
Lily: But why am I the only one? How come Marshall isn't doing anything crazy?
Marshall: So all we need is one large shipping box and 100 white mice.
shipping 発送 mice =mouseの複数形
Ted: All done.
Lily: Ted, let's go to New Haven.
Ted: Lily, don't do this to yourself.
Lily: I just need to know if I can get in. If I do this interview, and get into the program, then I'll know, and I can forget all about it, and get married. Come on! It's an adventure.
Ted: No, it's not an adventure. It's a mistake.
Lily: Okay, yes, it's a mistake. I know it's a mistake. But there are certain things in life where you know it's a mistake but you don't really know it's a mistake because the only way to really know it's a mistake is to make the mistake, and look back, and say, "Yep. That was a mistake." So, really, the bigger mistake would be to not make the mistake, because then you go your whole life not really knowing if something is a mistake or not. And, damn it, I've made no mistakes! I've done all of this-- my life, my relationship, my career-- mistake-free. Does any of this make sense to you?
Ted: I don't know. You said "mistake" a lot. Lily, don't do this.
Lily: Ted, I'm getting married in two months, and I'm freaking out, and you're my best friend, and you just have to forgive me for this.
Ted: Forgive you for what? Lily. Lily! Hey, Lily, this is Ted, the guy you left stranded by the side of the road. I just wanted to say good luck with the interview, remember to pick up some milk... Oh, and, when I get home, I'm going to kill you. And, also, I texted you the same thing. Hey, I need a big favor.
stranded 立ち往生した text メールをうつ
Barney: Anything, bro.
Ted: I need you to come up to Duchess County and pick me up.
Ted: It's kind of an emergency.
Barney: What are you doing in Duchess County?
Ted: Apple picking. Can you just get up here?
Barney: I wish I could help, buddy, but I'm stuck here at work. We're kind of swamped.
Marshall: Is that Ted?
Barney: Yeah. He's stuck in Duchess County.
Marshall: Don't you have a big date tonight?
Ted: Uh... Marshall. Hi. Yes. Yes, I do.
Marshall: So what are you doing in Duchess County?
Ted: Can't a brother go apple picking without getting the third degree? Damn!
get the third degree 厳しい尋問や取り調べるを受ける
Marshall: Okay, well, hang on. I'm coming to get you.
Marshall: Relax, man. I'll take the Fiero.
Ted: No, no, no. Just... forget it. Ha, ha! A little prank. I'm not in Duchess County.
Marshall: So that's the prank? That you're not in Duchess County?
Ted: Yep. Gotcha! Classic! Gotta go.