Hey.Dude, why would you do that?
Because I'm angry at you! I'm angry at me! I'm angry at Ted! And frankly, I'm still angry at the Empire.
Why are you angry at me?
Dude, you've been a real jerk in front of Robin while she's been going through her mourning period.
Mourning period? She hasn't been going through any mourning period.
Such a guy.
Ugh, Barney, sit down.You need to hear some stuff.
What, what? Is she upset or something?
Of course she's upset.Take a look at yourself, you dumb slut.
And then Aunt Lily told Barney every excruciating detail of what he hadn't been seeing since the breakup.
You should've seen this girl.Bang, ping, pawdau, gu-dunk.
Okay, I'm leaving.
So, we get up to my place.
bang, bangity bang, bang, bang, bang Bang, bang, bangity bang I said bang, bang, bangity bang, bang, bang, bang
I can't believe Robin's been so upset.
I can't believe you threw up in your Stormtrooper helmet.
Eh.I did something worse in it after The Phantom Menace premiere.So she's been this way ever since we broke up?
Actually, she was doing much better until you decided to go on this stupid superdate with Anita.And now, she's off sulking God knows where.
I know where.
Hey, Barney.What's up? I thought you were going on some big date.
Robin, I know you're upset.
What? No.I have never been happier.And this Anita sounds lovely.I am so glad that you two just randomly happened to find each other.It just warms my freaking heart!
So, are you sure you're not upset?
Well, of course I'm upset, Barney! Don't you see how constantly talking about your conquests makes me feel like I'm just another number to you?
But you're not just another number to me.
You know, and now you're taking Anita, who you barely know, on this amazing date, when I never got treated that way.It just It just sucks, that's all.It just sucks.
Wow.I knew I was bad at being a boyfriend, but I had no idea I'd be so much worse at being an ex-boyfriend.I'm sorry.What can I do to make it up to you?
Nothing, Barney.You've already proven that I'm not important to you.
Oh, stop that.I'm serious.Ask me for anything.
Uh, okay, don't sleep with Anita.
Barney, of course you're gonna sleep with her.Why else would you be taking her on this superdate?
She's not going on the superdate, Robin.You are.
Your Uncle Barney finally gave Aunt Robin the superdate she truly deserved.With a guy she truly deserved.Of course, there was still one loose end.
Oh, hey, Anita.I totally meant to call you.
Well, I'm breaking all my rules coming down here, but nobody stands me up like that, so, are we going out or what?
I'm sorry, I made a promise to a friend.I have to say no.
Oh.Oh, I see.You're trying the no thing on me.You really think that's gonna work? 'Cause it won't! Okay, how about this, I'll cut you a deal.Maybe you might get lucky after the 12th date.
The 11th date.
Tonight before dinner.
How about you? You interested?
Come on, Barney!
I'm sorry, Anita.The answer is no.
Well, good! Because my answer is no, too! Okay, here's my final offer.Barney!
And that's my story.
Well, here's a $500 ticket for jumping in the river.I hope it was worth it.
I hope so, too.
It's not true.It's an old wives' tale.
Oh, hey, Robin.
How'd the big date go?
Uh, pretty well.Pretty, pretty well.
Like, how pretty well?
Oh, guys, guys, come on.It was fine.You know, it was nice.We had a good time.Let's just Let's just leave it at that, okay? Although, one interesting thing did happen.I said a bang, bang, bangity bang I said a bang, bang, bangity bang A bang, bang, bang, bang bang, bangity bang I said a bang, bang, bangity bang Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang bang, bang, bangity bang