Barney: What up, non-finishers?
Ted: Wow. Very impressive, Barney.
Barney: Right? Yeah, my time would have been like a half an hour better, but I met this total hottie on Mile Seven. We took a quick detour and had our own mini marathon behind a Nathan's. I won.
Lily: I'm not sure anyone in that story is a winner.
Barney: So where's my 50 bucks?
Marshall: All right. I got to admit, you earned this.
Barney: Huh? Can't believe they haven't made a coin for this yet. Anyway, I'm heading home. Might go hit the gym.
Marshall: Oh, hey, just so you know, uh, all marathon runners get to use the subway for free today.
Barney: Wow. You know I really should check out this "subway." Heard so much about it. Wow. Look at me. Slumming it. Maybe I'll make a weekend out of it and I'll call my bridge and tunnel girl tonight.
make a weekend of it 週末を楽しく過ごす
Ted: You're dating a girl from New Jersey?
Narator: So Barney did it. He actually finished the marathon. But a little while later... I got an interesting phone call.
Barney: Ted, it's Barney. Listen to me, I need you to come and pick me up on the subway.
Ted: What, what are you talking about?
Barney: I was sitting here, totally minding my own business.
minding my own business 自分のことで手がいっぱいなんだ。
Barney: Finisher. Yeah, you know what I mean.
Voice: 86th street.
Barney: My legs don't work. I've already ridden the subway twice end to end. I've seen where it turns around. Ted, you don't ever want to see where the subway turns around.
Ted: Barney's legs won't work. He's riding the subway from end to end because he physically can't get off the train.
Marshall: Best 50 bucks I ever spent.
Barney: Listen to me, Ted. I'm going to lose you any second. I'm on the fourth car of the six train heading south from Pelham Bay Park in the Bronx. Meet me at the 86th Street station in, like, half an hour?
Ted: All right. I'll be right there. Stay where you are.
Barney: Ted, Ted.
Woman: Oh, come on. You're not even going to give up your seat for him?
Barney: I'm sorry. I can't.
Old lady: Douche.
Robin: See? If Barney never tried to run the marathon, you never would have jumped that turnstile, you wouldn't have had that court date today, and we would have made this flight.
Ted: You're right. Everything can be traced back to him. Like that rash we all got at Christmas. I have to see what's going on.
trace back to 〜に遡る
Woman: So I was able to get you two seats.
Ted: Really? That's great!
Woman: No, no, not you. I'm talking to my mom about Blue Man Group. Ma, can I call you back?
Ted: Okay, what about our flight? Can we get on?
Woman: I'm still waiting for... Huh. Looks like your flight left already.
Ted: What? No, n-n-n-no, n-no. I have to be in Chicago today.
Robin: Well, he never even called you back?
Woman: Well, it's typical pilot.They don't call you back at work and they don't call you back after you spend two nights with them at a Radisson in Orlando.
Narator: It turned out there was one other flight that would just barely get me to Chicago on time for my job interview, but it was all the way on the other side of the airport.
Robin: What was the name of the airline again?
Ted: I think it was something like Flights R' Us.
Robin: Was the "R" backwards?
Ted: God, I hope not.
Ted: Stupid smart carts. More like dumb carts.
Robin: If we miss this flight, it's all Barney's fault.
Ted: You know, Barney never would have run the marathon in the first place if Marshall hadn't broken his toe.
Robin: Yeah, so? What, you think this is my fault?
Narator: For Marshall, the initial idea to run the marathon came way back in April.
Marshall: My pants are starting to feel a little tight.
Lily: Oh, that's okay. I love that cute little belly.
Marshall: I cannot allow this.
Marshall: I am going to run the New York City Marathon.
Lily: "It is important to load up on carbohydrates two to four hours before a big run. Try a breakfast of a bagel, a banana, oatmeal, strawberries and some orange juice." Here you go, Marshmallow. Just like the book said.
load up on 〜を大量に詰め込む carbohydrate 炭水化物
Marshall: Yeah, but from now on, I'm eating all of my breakfast runner-style. Liquids are digested faster. That way, no energy is wasted, and it's all about the run.
liquid 液体 digest 食べ物を消化する
Lily: "Don't forget to give yourself plenty of positive reinforcement."
Marshall: This is gonna be your best run yet. You're going to accomplish all of your goals. You are a robot sent from the future to win the marathon! You are... Marshall. You are... Marshall. You are Marshall! Yeah!
Lily: "Chafing or blisters can occur in a number of areas, including the feet, armpits, or even the nipples. Try using some petroleum jelly on the affected areas."
Chafing 擦傷 blister まめ armpit 脇の下
Marshall: Oh, gosh! Dude, you are a terrific runner. Tomorrow you're gonna run and finish the New York City Marathon! You're the best. You look good. Nobody does it better than you.