Wow, you stole The Playbook? So the girl on the Empire State Building?
A friend of mine, an actress.
An actress, of course! That explains her impeccable diction and her sluttiness.
impeccable 完璧な diction 口調
Barney, I've got half a mind to take that Playbook and put it up on the Internet for the whole world to see.
have half a mind to しようかと思っている
I won't, as long as you agree to no more scams, no more cons, no more hustles, no more hoodwinks, no more gambits, no more stratagems and no more bamboozles.
I noticed you left out flimflams.
No more flimflams!
Oh, my God.I'm sorry to interrupt, but look at this.
I got left at the altar.
Oh, my God, that's horrible! Wonder if that would work.
That's not even the worst one in there.Have you guys seen The My Penis Grants Wishes?
Really? A genie comes out of it?
Only if you rub it hard enough.
So, then what happened?
It says here, He breaks into song, and then the furniture comes to life and dances with him.
It's not very well thought out.It's no Mrs.Stinsfire.
No, what happened in real life?
Well, a few hours later
You know, I heard it was gonna rain.
If anyone's interested, I will be at MacLaren's Pub performing a play out of The Playbook entitled, The Scuba Diver. That is all.
Okay, that's it.I'm putting The Playbook up on the Internet.Baby, can you put The Playbook up on the Internet?
Yeah, of course, baby.But here's the weird thing, I've literally been through this book cover to cover.There's no play in here called The Scuba Diver.
Oh! So, now you guys wanna know what The Scuba Diver is? Well, it was on the last page of The Playbook, but I ripped it out, just in case.Don't worry, though.You're about to see it in action.See the blonde over there by the bar? Tizzarget aquizired.
Barney, don't do this.
God, give it a rest, pest.If anyone should be mad, it should be Robin.She loves The Playbook.
give it a rest 黙れ！
I don't love The Playbook.
What are you The Playbook, it's gold.You gotta admit, it's pretty spectac.
Look, Barney, we just broke up.I mean, yes, the costumes are cute, but we just broke up.
Well, I didn't know you felt that way.I guess I've been so wrapped up in my own stuff that I Oh, crap, she's looking over here.Quick, everyone, scatter.
That's it.Hi.You see that guy over there in the scuba suit?
And that brings us to right now.
Wow.But wait.So, why is he wearing scuba gear?
We don't know and it's killing us, Claire.It's killing us.
Well, let's go ask him.
So what's The Scuba Diver? And this is Claire, by the way.
Hello, Claire.My name is Lieutenant Frank Lyman.I train bomb-sniffing dolphins for the You know what? I can't do this.Robin, I am so sorry.I guess this breakup's been tougher on me than I thought.I think this Playbook was just a way to take my mind off of things.
It's okay.It's been tough on me, too.I mean, look at me.I've sworn off relationships.
She's so about to get married.
I gotta work on my toast.
I gotta make sure my tux fits.
I will bang your heads together like coconuts.
Barney, I'm so glad you're stopping this.And, frankly, the real Barney is way cooler than any of the fake Barneys in this Playbook.
Is that right? Claire, you've probably heard a lot about the real Barney tonight.Wanna grab a cup of coffee?
Okay, Claire, before you turn him down, I think you should know that under this neoprene suit, with what appears to be a tube sock stuffed in the crotch
Can of Pringles, but go on.
is an amazing guy.He's fun and one of my best friends and he landed this hottie.
He's a good guy.
Come on, Claire, go out with him.
It's just a cup of coffee, right?
Yeah, come on.
Yeah, it can't hurt.
All right, all right.Let's get some coffee.
And by the end of the night
I'm proud of that guy.To be that vulnerable takes a lot of Pringles.
Whoo! I got a text from Barney.Look under the table. It's a page from The Playbook.
What's it say?
It's The Scuba Diver.
Step one, tell a meddlesome female friend about The Playbook.Step two, run a play on one of her co-workers making her so angry she steals The Playbook.Step three, put on the scuba suit, and tell her you're going to do one more scam, called 'The Scuba Diver, ' on the hot girl standing by the bar.Your friend, let's call her Lily, goes and talks to the girl and tells her everything about The Playbook.Now, here's where it gets tricky.When Lily and the girl ask what 'The Scuba Diver'is, take off your mask, give them some spiel about your deep-seated insecurities, which don't really exist because, let's face it, you're awesome.Feeling bad for you, Lily talks you up to the girl, who then agrees to go get coffee with you.And it is on.
meddlesome おせっかいな spiel 大げさな話
You son of a bitch!
I'll give you a call.All right, bye-bye.For those of you keeping score, The Ted Mosby works.
Shh.Robin, here we go.You say you don't want a relationship.Well, the love of your life is about to walk through the door, and it's that guy.
Yeah, I'm not falling in love with that guy.
Right, right, right.'Cause it's gonna be that guy.
I don't know, the blue blazer is just, like, not doing it for me, so
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right 'cause here he comes.It's that guy.Robin, you should at least give her a chance.You know, make out with her a little.See if there's something there.
Okay, I'm going to work.
Yeah, you are.
No, I'm actually going to work.
Mmm-hmm.Go to work Work
And the ironic part was
Hi.Are you Robin?
I'm Don, your new co-host.
That was the day she met Don.
Damn it, Marshall.