Ted: And so, due to one architectural oversight, the Toledo Bridge Disaster of 1906 claimed the lives of 75 people. Now, I hate to stop while I'm on a roll, but happy Halloween, ya crazies!
oversight 過失 claimed 犠牲にした on a roll 仕事がはかどって
Student1: Hey, Professor Brosby, you gonna come get beers with us later?
Ted: Nah, I got a thing. But you kids have fun trick or treating.
Student2: This is a treat. You're the coolest, Professor Mosby.
Ted: Well, hot dog.
Lily: Did it hurt?
Lily: Getting that kid's nose surgically removed from your ass.
Ted: It's not her nose that's in my ass, Lily, it's her heart. My class loves me; I-I'm really making an impression on those guys.
Barney: I'd like to make impression on those guys. Man, I love the office Halloween party. It is so much sluttier than the office Christmas party. Though not as freaky as the office President's Day Rave. Or the office Tu B'Shvat Pajama Jammy-Jam.
Randy: Hey, guys. Hey Boss.
Marshall: Hey, Randy. Uh, you want a beer?
Randy: Oh, no, thank you. I brew my own. At the risk of bragging, my Hazelnut Pilsner won fourth prize at the Weehawken Retirement Home Clam Bake and Wheelchair Maintenance Picnic.
Barney: I wouldn't consider any part of that bragging.
Randy: Hey, it just occurred to me, is your friend, what's her name? Garbin, Flabin...
Randy: Robin. That's it, yeah. Is she gonna be here? Oh, not that I really care.
Lily: Robin has another party to go to.
Randy: No! Damn it! I'm leaving.
Lily: But she might stop by later.
Randy: I guess I can hang out a little longer. So, anyone going to see the Halloween parade?
Narator: Oh, we were big fans of New York's annual Halloween parade. I don't mean the one that takes place Halloween night in the Village. I mean the one that takes place the morning of November 1st, the Annual Post Halloween Walk of Shame Parade.
Marshall: Look at them heading home after their dirty, filthy hookups.
filthy 下品な hookups セックス
Barney: Looks like that bee got busy.
Ted: Looks like that French maid didn't turn down somebody's bed.
Marshall: Oh, looks like Pocahontas has a couple of wounded knees.
Ted: Come on, Marshall.
Barney: That's a line.
Marshall: No, it's because of the...
Ted: We get it.
Barney: Does it get any better than this?
Ted: Uh, yes. Yes, it does.
Barney: There she is Florence Night-In-Bed-With-A-Stranger.
Lily: So, who's the lucky patient?
Robin: I don't want to talk about it.
Ted: Please tell me you're not hooking up with one of your co-anchors again.
Robin: My co-anchor's a woman.
Barney: Please tell me you are hooking up with one of your co-anchors again.
Narator: Robin had always believed that the key to success was intelligence, hard work and professionalism. Her new co-anchor Becky had a different philosophy.
Becky: Boats! Boats! Boats!
Announcer: It's the Farhampton Boat Show! Remember 5th, 6th and 7th at the Farhampton Civic Center. Come on down.
Robin: You did a commercial?
Becky: Why not?
Robin: You're a journalist! Don't you want to be taken seriously?
Becky: No. I'm cute.
Robin: Okay, well, if you really think this is going to help your image.
Mike: Hi, Becky. Boats, boats, boats! Robin, a little help here?
Ted: Robin, you gotta not worry so much about being liked.
Robin: Oh, easy for you to say. Everybody loves you at your job.
Narator: That was true of my teaching job. But I was also designing the new headquarters for Goliath National Bank, and well...
Zoey: Ted Mosby, we don't like you! What do you have to say for yourself, tearing down a beautiful, old building just to put up a stupid bank headquarters?
Ted: Hmm... Boo... freakin'... hoo.
Zoey: Boo freakin' hoo? That's it? The Arcadian is an architecturally significant...
Ted: Architecturally significant?! Zoey, you're very pretty. Your hair smells great.
Zoey: Shampoo. You should try it sometime.
Ted: You don't know the first thing about architecture.
Zoey: Key - Ted Mosby's car. Go on.
Ted: I'm a professor, okay? I teach this stuff at one of the best colleges in the country. I don't go down to your place of non-employment and lecture you about how your little protest is a misguided waste of time, except whoops, I just did. Ha-burn.
Zoey: Oh, good, the eggs are here.
Ted: Well, I should head up.
Narator: No, GNB was not popular. That's why every year they produced a feel-good video to improve the bank's image.
announcer: What makes Goliath National Bank different from other big banks? Here at GNB, we care.
Barney: I care about our precious Earth.
Randy: I care about old people.
Man: I care about high-yield offshore investments. And so does Tugboat here. Isn't that right, Tugboat?
Marshall: Yeah. Okay, get that camera out of my face before I flip you like a cheese omelet.
Barney: All you have to do is say "I care about making dreams come true."
Marshall: First of all, that line makes me sound like a hooker and saying it makes me feel like a hooker, so.
Barney: Everyone is in this video. Randy's in the video.
Randy: I don't want to brag, but in 29 takes, I only threw up thrice.
Marshall: Wait. Randy, did you send the Hermanson contracts downtown?
Randy: I did. I sent them downtown. Why are you saying it like that?
Marshall: They never arrived at the downtown office.
Randy: They... Well, just to make sure we're on the same page is "send them downtown" not an expression for shredding a document?
Marshall: You shredded them?!
Randy: Yeah. I sent them downtown. You know, down into the shredder. You-you feed the paper in a downwards fashion, so that's where the expression comes from.
Marshall: That's not an expression! That has never been an expression!
Randy: Okay, I can fix this. I am all over this project.
Barney: I'll say this. There is no quit in that guy. You should fire him.
Marshall: Okay, that, that right there. That attitude is exactly why I won't be in your video. Because GNB doesn't care. They hand out pink slips like they're hors d'oevres. Just last week, I was talking to Arthur...
Arthur: Oh, whoa, you're wearing a green tie now. I'm wearing a green tie.
Marshall: GNB treats people like they're disposable, and I will not be a part of that. Marshall Eriksen does not fire people, period.
Randy: Uh, just want you to know, we are making good progress on this new project. Oh, you gentlemen keep talking, I will answer that. Marshall Eriksen's office. Yeah, I can get that for you. Just a second. Uh... bank. The "B" stands for bank. Okay, Mother, I'll see you tonight. Oh, yikes. I'd better get Mr. Messy a napkin.