Ted: So he's a rabbit. At least you know for sure.
Robin: Ted, this may hurt a little, I'm recycling your old Architecture Weekly magazines.
Ted: What are you doing?
Robin: Cleaning. You go on your date. Happy Valentine's Day.
Marshall: Oh, thank god, you're here!
Ted: Yeah, I've been thinking, hmm, maybe we should call this whole thing off...
Marshall: No. Ted. We got her. It's, it's the craziest thing. We were searching all week and then a couple hours ago...
Marshall: Blah Blah?
Lily: Ted's her least favorite person in the world.
Marshall: Well, she's not getting any younger.
Barney: Get rid of it. This phone is cursed. Cursed, I tell you! I tried to ignore it but it just never stops ringing. It's ruining my life! I should get that. No, please, please, please, Marshall, let me answer it, it could be an emergency, she could be trapped in a giant bra.
Ranjit: Barney, Barney, let it go... to voicemail.
Marshall: We have to find Ted a wife. We're being too choosey. It almost doesn't matter who it is at this point.
Ted: It's a phone girl!?
Marshall: I know, I know... but no, then we met her and Ted... she's a world-class violinist, she's a gourmet cook and she can quote every line from Caddy Shack.
Hot Chick: Hello, Ted! "And what brings you to this nape of the woods, neck of the wape? Why are you here?"
nape 首筋 nape of the woods, neck of the wape a colloquial expression meaning "this general area", meant to sound rural and folksy.
Narator: So we all had dinner. And kids, Lily and Marshall's hard work had paid off. Because that girl was terrific. In fact...
Marshall: Oh but Natalia, tell Ted the problem.
Lily: Yeah, yeah, tell him, tell him!
Natalia: Well, unfortunately I'm going to have to leave the country soon because my visa is about to expire.
Lily: She needs to get married.
Marshall: Federal law expressly dictates that a foreign national can't maintain residency for longer than six months without a work visa.
expressly 明示的に dictate 命令する maintain 養う residency 居住
Narator: But when it came down to it...
when you come down to it それについて現実的によく考えてみると
Waiter: And you, Sir? The rabbit or the duck?
Waiter: It's a pre-fixed menu for Valentine's Day and we're already out of the steak, fish and chicken. So rabbit or duck?
Ted: Rabbit. Sorry, guys, I gotta go.
Marshall: Why would Ted order the rabbit if he's just gonna run out?
Barney: I need it back. Where is the phone? Well, heeellooooo. Oh I met you already. Where is the phone?
Lily: It's hidden.
Narator: Where had Aunt Lily hidden the phone? Well, to answer that question, we have to back up a little bit.
Robin: You go on your date. Happy Valentine's Day.
Ted: Barney's phone... I wonder how it got in there?
Robin: Ted! Come on. Big date.
Ted: Uh what's the harm... Hello!
Narator: And just like that, I was hooked.
Ted: Terrific. I will see you there. And I'll be the guy in the awesome blazer. Ah ah ah I think you'll know the blazer when you see it. Oooh! I gotta go.
Marshall: Oh, thank god, you're here.
Waiter: So rabbit or duck?
Ted: Rabbit. Sorry, guys, I gotta go.
Ted: Well, heeellooooo. Sorry, babe, I gotta take this. Barney's phone, Teddy Westside speaking.
Barney: My phone. I'm taking it back. And I'm taking your cool nickname too. Barney Westside speaking.
Ted: No, no, I love it so much. It just keeps ringing and ringing and ringing. Give it, give it.
Barney: Hey, baby...
Ted: It's mine now.
Barney: It's not your phone.
Marshall: Lily.. No. No! Aaaargh.
Ted: Being single sucks. It turns you into a crazy person.
Robin: I know. So much running around and freaking out. For what?
Ted: So long as you can find someone you can sit on the couch and put off cleaning the bathroom with.
Robin: Well, the joke's on the rest of the world cause we can do that on our own.
Don: Robin, I have to apologize...
Robin: Save it. Let's just do the news.
Don: No. Listen... after you left the other night, I was embarrassed. Not because I was naked. I'm actually pretty OK with my body.
Don: I got married in college. I just got divorced three months ago. I have no idea how to be single. But that's not why I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed by my behavior right here at Channel...hmm, it starts with a 1, I know that, but...
Robin: You can... just look at your mug.
Don: Right. Well, no, you look at this mug. You are a tremendous news anchor. And you deserve a co-anchor who gives a crap. And from here on out, it's gonna be me.
Robin: Well, I'll believe that when I see it.
Don: Well, you'll see it right now. I'll go get you some coffee.
Robin: Don!! You're wearing pants!
Don: Well, look at that!
Robin: Uh, duck!