And like the other ill-advised five-word sentences every man eventually says in his life
I can jump that far.
I'm gonna win her back.
I can trust you guys.
We would come to regret it.We just didn't know it yet.
You have it? Awesome I'll be right there.Ranjit!
Uh, I'm Rachel Sondheimer.
Wait a minute, Lily.If you are getting off the plane, where is Marshall? And where is your six-pack?
That's the problem.I have to get to Brewniverse in East Meadow in an hour.
To the Town Car!
Oh, thank you.
Oh, barkeep.Triple Sec.
Coming right up, tap-minder.
We'll get one.
We'll get one.
Oh, thank God you're still here.
I don't know if you guys have ever seen Star Wars, but it's like Hoth out there.
It reminds me of when I used to go sledding with my dad before he left.
So, uh, can we warm you up with a drink?
Sure oh, uh, by the way, I invited the rest of the band to come and meet us.
We were hoping to get drunk.I mean really drunk.Like my dad used to.
Dibsity, dibsity, dibsity.
Well, I guess we could keep the place open a little bit longer.As long as it's just you and the band.
Um, Melissa, what kind of band is this?
Oh, we're the Arizona Tech Fighting Hens Marching Band.
And then, your Uncle Barney and I had one of our telepathic conversations.
Dude, Carl's gonna kill us if we don't kick everyone out of here right now.Barney, I'm serious.We promised we wouldn't mess the place up.All right, I guess you have a point.The bar is open!
Who wants a beer, huh?
I still say this is stupid.What happened to, "As we mature, the relationship matures with us"?
That's just something Lily read in Psychology Today.All right, she read it in Cosmo.All right, I read it in Cosmo.All right, it was Cosmo Girl.Just drive, okay.
I just don't get why it's such a big deal that one little ritual goes by the wayside.
ritual 儀式 go by the wayside 棚上げされる
It's not just this, okay? It's all our little rituals.Do you know what we used to do every day the second I got home?
Man, I don't want to hear about your crazy monkey sex.
We would tell each other what we had to eat that day.
Two eggs, a slice of cheese pizza and some steamed veggies.
Everything bagel, chicken breast, some celery sticks and a spoon of peanut butter.
Crazy monkey sex?
Crazy monkey sex.
Oh, Lily, TMI-- too many informations.
TMI =too many informations
You know what else I miss? Our lunchtime phone call.
Hey, baby, it's lunchtime, and I love you.
I reciprocate in principle.Although with the caveat that there seems to be a bit of a surplus here on my end.
reciprocate 報いる principle 行動規範 caveat 差し止め請求 surplus 黒字
No, I love you more.
Do we need to get in a room together and bang this thing out? Those sound like agreeable terms, although I may need adjust my briefs.Love you, too.
But today when she called, I let it go to voice mail.Voice mail!
How could you?!
The thing I miss most is kissing at midnight on New Year's Eve.
It was a New Year's tradition.But you know what we did this year?
Crazy monkey sex?
Okay, all these cute, adorable little rituals.
They're stupid. Telling each other what you had to eat? You're like children playing house.
Well maybe you just think they're stupid because you've never been in a relationship long enough to develop them.
You don't understand love.Okay, you're like some robot who sees a person crying and says "Why is that human leaking?"
Is that right?
Well, then Robot initiating pull-over-to-the- side-of-the-road- until-jackass-apologizes- to-me sequence.
My robot was like, a million times better.
Oh, hey, just so you know, the trough in the bathroom is overflowing.
There's no trough in the bathroom.And you just came out of the kitchen.
Ted, what's in a gin and tonic?! What's in a gin and tonic?!
Okay, running a bar sucks.Let's just close up.
No! No! There's no last call.Puzzles, go for Barney.
Good.You're still there.I'll be there in five.
Robin, there's a snowplow coming.We have to get back on the road.
You think the only way to be in love is to have pet names.Or leave each other stupid, little notes or go charging off into a blizzard for no good reason.
Seriously, do you understand what's going to happen if that plow comes by?
You know what you are? You're a love snob.There's lots of ways to be in a relationship, and you would know that if you ever left your little love snob country club.
We're going to get buried by snow.That's going to happen.
No, screw this.I'm not going to sit here and be insulted.We're not going to the airport.We're going home.What just happened?