Randy: Hey, guys.
Barney: Uh-oh. I know that smile. Lily, there's no easy way to say this. Marshall's dead. Randy murdered him.
Lily: No. I know why Randy is smiling. You're smiling because of Robin.
Randy: Robin? Like how I think about her when I'm in the shower?
Ted: I'm trying to eat here, buddy.
Lily: No. Because you slept with her on Halloween.
Randy: What? No. I went home, had a shower an-and went to bed.
Lily: You didn't sleep with her?
Randy: No. Even in the shower, the farthest we ever get is hugging.
Lily: So why are you smiling?
Randy: I'll tell you why.
Marshall: This just isn't working out.
Randy: I'm fired. Great. This is the candle kiosk at the mall all over again. Wait a minute. I can get a severance check. If I don't shred it, I can use that money to start my own brewery. Imagine a beer with my name on it. Randy Wharmpiss, this is the best day of your life.
Randy: Thanks to that severance check, this time next year, you'll all be enjoying a frothy mug of Wharmpiss.
Marshall: Randy, great news! You're not fired!
Ted: Good morning, everybody... Where's my class?
Zoey: Hello, Professor. Ha-boom.
Marshall: I got you your job back, Randy. I thought that you'd be happy.
Randy: But I don't belong here. I'm born to be a brewer! A... a hops meister!
Marshall: Well, then quit. No one's stopping you.
Randy: I-I can't. I need my severance check.
Marshall: Well, I'm sorry Randy, but that's called fraud.
Randy: It's not fraud. I'm just asking you to get me a lot of money to not work here and not tell anyone about it.
Marshall: Even if I wanted to fire you, after my talk with Arthur...
Randy: Oh, come on, Arthur can't remember that.
Arthur: Marshall, what a memorable talk we had yesterday. Randy, on behalf of everyone at GNB, both in and out of prison, we're sorry. And I want to assure you you will never be fired again. You're going to work here until you die, huh? Green tie? Nice choice.
on behalf of 代表して
Randy: Thanks. It brings out my eyes.
bring out someone's eyes 目を引く
Arthur: Yeah. I'll bring out your eyes.
Marshall: Listen, Randy, I'm sorry, but I broke my own moral code once and I felt evil. I will not let GNB change me. I will never fire anyone again ever.
Randy: Oh, we'll see about that.
Barney: Anyhoo, while I got you-- big smile. "We care about making dreams come true," in three, two...
Marshall: What are you doing?
Randy: Oh, are you unhappy with my performance? Well, I guess I'm fired, then. I'd better turn in my I.D.
Marshall: No, it's actually, um, nice having some of this clutter off my desk. So thank you, Randy.
clutter off 取り散らかす
Randy: And there's more.
Barney: I don't know what I'm going to use this for, but it's great stuff.
Randy: Now am I fired?
Marshall: I've been meaning to clean out that file cabinet for ages.
Barney: I'm not even here. Randy, the coffee.
Marshall: Oh! Okay. Okay. Thank you, Randy. I've been meaning to cut back on my caffeine.
Barney: Here, try this, but really go for it. Remember, this guy ruined your life.
Marshall: That's just the pick-me-up I needed.
Barney: Speaking of pickups, can we try the first one again?
Ted: It didn't work. They hate me. How do I get them to like me again?
Lily: You don't. Ted, you're their teacher. The only people that like their teachers...
Ted: I like my teachers.
Lily:...are dorks. Except for you, Miles. Ted, you just have to learn to embrace their hatred. Because behind that hatred lies fear. And you can use that fear, like I did with Johnny Marley.
embrace 受け入れる hatred 嫌悪
Ted: Was there more to that story?
Lily: A little bit.
Ted: Lily, you're a psychopath.
Lily: A little bit. Oh, a panda!
Narator: I thought about Lily's advice. And I figured fear was worth a try.
Zoey: Well, Professor Mosby, is there anything you want to say to us?
Ted: Anyone not in class tomorrow gets an "F."
Lily: You said that?
Ted: Well, technically, they'd get an incomplete, but I thought "F" had a nice, scary ring to it. Right?
Robin: Hey, guys.
Lily: Robin, who'd you sleep with?
Robin: I told you-- Randy. He was a machine.
Lily: Where's the poop, Robin?
Robin: Fine. I didn't sleep with anyone. The thing is, ever since Becky did that commercial, everyone at work loves her. So, the day after Halloween, I was in a commercial.
Ted: What... Why didn't you tell us?
Announcer: Bladder trouble; it's embarrassing, it's uncomfortable, and it can affect anyone.
Robin: I'm going to the bathroom right now.
Announcer: Neat and discreet adult diapers for anyone.
Neat こぎれい discreet 目立たない
Robin: Say... "Ah..."
Ted: Wow! I can't wait to see it.
Robin: Well, hopefully you never will. They said that they might not even use it.
Narator: It ran for seven years.
Randy: Okay, you win. Maybe trashing your office was a mistake. It's just, uh, as long as I can remember, making beer has been my dream. Wharmpiss? I know it sounds dumb to someone who's already achieved his dream, big-time lawyer at a huge corporation.
Marshall: You think working here is my dream?
Randy: Of course. Anyways, I'll clean this stuff up. Have someone get that dead squirrel out of your desk.
Marshall: Randy. This is delicious. You're fired.
Narator: Kids, the next morning, my class had the highest attendance it had ever had. And not long after that, Randy used his severance money to start a little brewery. Now you can have a Wharmpiss at every bar in America. And all because...
Marshall: I care about making dreams come true. You got what you need?
Barney: Yep. That's a wrap.