Ted: I don't know Lily, after five years, her expectations have gotta be pretty high.
Marshall: Notable deaths in 2003... Oh my God... Nell Carter. Did you guys know that Nell Carter had died?
Notable deaths 著名人の死
Ted: I really gonna have to bring my A-game to satisfy this woman.
Robin: Yeah, it'll be pretty hard now that she's dead.
Ted: Not Nell Carter... Stella.
Marshall: Dude, relax, it's all about expectations management. Do you know why I hated Jerry Maguire so much?
Ted: Because you're dead inside?
dead inside 心が死んでいる
Marshall: No, because you built it up for, like, two weeks, saying it was the greatest movie ever. With Stella, do the opposite lower expectations.
Ted: Right, right, and then no matter what happens, she'll be happy.
Marshall: Hey, buddy. I'm married, Barney, I cannot be your new wingman.
Barney: Hey, Randy. Could you come here for a minute? Good news. I'm calling you up to the majors. Starting tomorrow night, how would you like to be my new wingman?
Randy: Uh... Just need to check my calendar. Be right back. Tomorrow works.
Ted: I have a surprise appetizer for us today. Check it out. Potato skins.
Ted: Yeah. Right? God, it's been forever since I had potato skins. I remember them as being pretty much the most delicious things ever. Huh. That's surprising.
Ted: This potato skin. It's good but not nearly as good as I'd built it up to be in my head. Even though potato skin performed admirably, and is a totally respectable size... I couldn't enjoy it because of my own unrealistic expectations.
Stella: Hmm, Ted, I see what you're doing. You're trying to lower my expectations for tonight. Is this a lengh thing?
Stella: Quick on the draw?
Quick on the draw 反応が速い
Stella: Unexpected number of testicles?
Ted: No. It's just that this is a big deal for you. I mean, it's like your virginity the sequel.
Stella: Virginity 2: Eletric Boogaloo?
Ted: Exactly, and I don't want to mess it up. I don't want you to ever wonder if was worth it.
Stella: Oh Ted, of course it's gonna be worth it. Stop worrying. It's you and me. It already has everything it needs.
Ted: "Unexpected number of testicles?"
Stella: It happens. I knew a guy in med school... we used to joke that we was one ball away from getting walked.
med school 医大
Randy: What up bro-seph Lieberman?
Barney: No, uh-uh. Randy, we never use the word "bro" in the name of a failed Democratic vice presidential candidate.
Democratic vice-presidential candidate 民主党の副大統領候補
Randy: Goodbye "Geraldine Ferrar-bro".
Barney: You know what? I'm excited about this, Randy. You will be my next masterpiece. It's like with Ted. When I first met him, he was an even bigger loser than you.
Randy: What a loser.
Barney: But tonight, I'm going to make you the greatest wingman in the history of wingmen.
Randy: Oh, it's gonna be easier than you think, bro. Yeah. I've been reading your blog for years. You are like a God to me. That's why tonight is going to be legendary... wait for it... dary.
Barney: Oh, okay, Randy, let's do this.
Barney: You ready?
Randy: Yes. No, no, no, no, no, no!
Barney: What? What's the matter?
Randy: Nothing, let's do this. No, no, no, no, no, please, please, please! Just wait, just wait, just wait, just wait!
Barney: Randy what are you doing?
Randy: Dripping with game, that's what I'm doing. Okay let's go. No. Yes. No! Randy listen to me. You can do this okay? Ok. I don't know. Are thos girls really that hot? Yes, they're hot. Let's do this. Okay!
Barney: Hey, laddies. Have you met...
Ted: So, here's the plan. Take a horse-drawn carriage through the park, and it just so happens the Philharmonic is playing an open-air...
horse-drawn carriage 馬車
Stella: Ted. Five years.
Ted: Straight to the hotel?
Stella: Straight to the hotel.
Ted: I'll get my bag.
Stella: Hey, guys.
Marshall: Hey. So, uh, looking forward to tonight?
Stella: Yeah. Definitly. It's been such a long time since I've had a night out.
Lily: Yeah. We heard. I would explode if it had been that long since I had a "night out".
Marshall: This one wakes me up at 4am sometimes just to have a little night out.
Stella: Um, what are you guys talking about?
Lily: Nothing. Pizza. What are you talking about?
Ted: Hey guys.
Stella: Ted, you told them, didn't you?
Ted: Told them what?
Stella: You told them that I haven't had sex in five years.
Marshall: You haven't had sex in five years??!! That is a shocking revelation that we're just finding out right now!
Ted: Stella, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told them. But they're my best friends. I tell them everything. I-I didn't even think about it.
Stella: Ted, that was so personal. Plus, now your friends think I'm a freak.
Ted: No, they don't.
Stella: Look, I realize it's weird, okay? Not many people go five years without having sex.
Barney: 13 years??!!
Randy: I peaked really young.
Stella: That's why it was difficult for me to tell you. But I did tell you because I thought that I could trust you.
Ted: You can trust me.
Stella: Obviously, I can't. You know there's always a reason not to sleep with a guy, and you just gave me yours.
Ted: Wait, did I gave you a reason or were you looking for one?
Stella: Why would be looking for one?
Ted: Because things are getting serious between us, and that scares you.
Stera: Good night, Ted.