ƒnƒCƒ‰ƒCƒg‚Í"I have to make amends for what I did."

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How I met your mother ƒV[ƒYƒ“7yŒ´‘čzDucky Tie

Hey, what do you guys think of my new ducky tie? Pretty cute, right? And not that much more expensive than a regular tie.

Hmm.

A ducky tie? Bro, why do you do this when you know I must slam you for it? You guys might want to look away 'cause this ain't gonna be pretty.You ready? Duck, duck gross.Hashtag burn, hashtag duck tie slam, hashtag Stinson rocks.What else is going on?

slam ”ń“‚é look away ‚ć‚ťŒŠ‚ˇ‚é

Oh, guess who I ran into.A girl from my past.Any guesses?

Stella.

Zoe.

Karen?

The girl who beat you up.

The girl who ruined a photo with Slash!

The girl who made you get the butterfly tattoo?

You make it sound like I've dated a series of Stieg Larrson novels.Perhaps I need to be a little more specific.I met this girl at a wedding.We were together for a while, but then she moved to Germany.We decided to try long distance, but it didn't work because I cheated on her with someone at this very table.

Victoria.

Victoria! She catered dessert for the Architects' Ball.

Wow.I mean, what's it been, like, what, six years?

Yeah, it's so funny how the past you know, you think you're doing fine, but you know, because true love God, Lily! What on Earth is going on with your cans?

Oh, these old things? I got my pregnancy boobs! I'm in that sweet spot where the chestal area knows I'm pregnant, but hasn't told the downstairs neighbors.

Well, what are you waiting for, Lil? Bust 'em out! Make 'em dance!

No!

Let your boobies show!

Okay, I'm sorry, pal, but the party in my wife's sweater is a private event, and I'm the bouncer.

bouncer —pS–_

Dude, I think they's the bouncers.

Okay, can we stop talking about my wife's breasts, please? Ted ran into Victoria!

I know, I'm still a little shaken by it.I mean, there she was after all these years.The emotions and memories and Geez, Lily, it's like you have a butt on your chest.

Whoo-whoo-whoo!

Why on Earth would I want to see that?

They're round and attached to my body.It's an even trade.

Okay, who wants dinner?

Bless you.Let's go to Shinjitsu.

Aw, again?

Really? You bring that up, like, once a month.

It's hibachi grilling with a vaudeville twist.I mean, come on, who's in?

vaudeville ƒ{[ƒhƒrƒ‹

No! Forget it!

Okay, how about this: if you can go ten seconds without looking at Lily's boobs, we'll go wherever you want to go.

Deal.

Damn it! Oh, well.

So you saw Victoria.You must have been freaked.

No, it was cool.

Hey, Ted.

Hey, kiddo.

Okay, Ted, 'cause from where I was standing

Robin! Just okay? I'm telling this story.

Instead of the obligatory awkward small talk, let me just kick this off by saying I'm really, really sorry.

obligatory ‹`–ą“I‚Č

Thanks.It's unnecessary, but thanks.

So, wasn't awkward.

It was a little awkward.

Not really.

It was a little awkward.Lucky for you, the cavalry rode in to smooth things over.

So, uh I stole your boyfriend! That was, like, crazy! Like, what?! But bridge, water under it.It was all Ted's fault.He got me drunk.What? Yeah! Be right there.

Oh, guess who's here? Robin.

Oh.I'm really happy for you guys.You look cute together.

Oh, no, no, we're not together.I mean, we-we dated for, like, a year.But now we're just friends.It's not weird.

No, no.Why would that be weird? I mean, if you hung out every day, that would

We do.

Still not be weird.I've never known anybody that hangs out with their ex every day.

Well, Barney does.

Really? Who's Barney's ex-girlfriend?

Robin.

Your Robin?

Mine and Barney's.

You don't all three hang out together?

All the time.

And we have weird.

It's not weird!

Has anyone gotten a bite yet?

Oh, good! Here we go! The main event.Oh, we got Takumi.He is good! I mean, who am I kidding? They're all amazing! Let the dinnertainment begin!

Oh, that reminds me, there's this other restaurant we should try sometime.What they do is, they cook your meal in a little room called a "kitchen." What's the name of that? Oh, yeah! "Every Other Restaurant In New York City." Hashtag burn, hashtag Your Tie Is Still Dumb, hashtag refill!

So you're talking to Victoria.

I'm talking to Victoria.

Well, I should probably get back to the bakery.I'm taking a late bus out to the Hamptons tonight, and I've got a sink full of dishes that my assistant did not clean.Because my assistant is me.But it was really good seeing you, Ted.

Yeah, you, too.

Okay.

Wait.Let me do the dishes.

What?

Victoria, do you believe in fate?

I believe you're about to give a big speech on fate.

Well, I do.And I think when two people like you and me randomly bump into each other, it means something.I have to make amends for what I did.Look, I can't undo what I did six years ago, but I can wash dishes.It's actually something I'm good at.

make amends for ‚̏ž‚˘‚đ‚ˇ‚é

Ted

I swear to you I am not trying anything.

I said, bang, bang, bangity-bang I said a bang, bang, bangity-bang.

Guys, guys! Shut up! Give the artist a little respect!

Sir, I apologize for that, and for what I'm about to say.Here's my impression of this guy.Uh! Ooh! Uh! Uh! Welcome to Shinjitsu! Uh! I used to be a night manager at Dairy Queen! Anyone can do that.

Oh really? Then why don't you do it, Barney? Show us all the tricks if they're so easy.Show us the onion volcano, the fried rice beating heart, the shrimp in the pocket.

I bet Ted showed Victoria the shrimp in his pocket.

Shrimp? Really?

Okay, I'll do all those things.You just name the time and the place.

Okay, right here after we eat.

And what do I get if I do?

What do you want?

I want to touch Lily's boobs.

Deal! Hey, sweetie?

Yeah, I heard.Okay, Barney, you want to make this real? Let's make this real.If you can do all that stuff that Marshall just listed off, I will let you touch one boob.

Both boobs.

Just one.

Touch and squeeze.

Just touch.

Touch and motorboat.

Just touch.

Honka honka?

Barney.

Just touch.

Just touch.

For one hour.

For one second.

Twenty minutes, both boobs.

Thirty seconds, one boob.

Four minutes, both boobs, three squeezes.

One minute, both boobs, one squeeze.

Deal!

But if you can't do everything and I mean everything, then you have to wear Marshall's ducky tie for one year.

Ooh.

Deal!

So you get to the bakery.

We get to the bakery.

‰^–˝

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