Narator: Kids, one morning in 2010, I opened the newspaper only to discover an op-ed written by Zoey Pierson. You remember Zoey.
Zoey: Key Ted Mosby's car.
Narator: In those four column inches, she railed against me and my company, GNB, for wanting to tear down a beautiful old building: The Arcadian. And as if that wasn't bad enough, the piece ran on a Saturday, which as you both know, is Dad's crossword day.
rail against 抗議する
Ted: She ruined crossword day! I can't believe this. She singles me out by name. Calls me a "fat cat." Me and my "fat-cat friends." We're not fat cats.
single out 選び出す
Barney: Exactly. I say, Marshall, my good man, how's my bow tie?
Marshall: Impeccable, old bean. To industry!
Impeccable 非の打ちどころない old bean 君
Barney: Ah, bully!
Narator: Okay, that night we weren't entirely un-fat-catty. You see, every year the Natural History Museum holds its Autumn Spectacular. It's attended by some of the most powerful and important people in New York, and, thanks to Goliath National Bank... us.
Marshall: Look at us, huh? In tuxedos? Can you imagine if our college selves saw us like this?
Ted: They'd pelt us with their Phish bootlegs.
pelt with 投げつける bootleg 海賊版
Marshall: Yeah, we were pretty anti-establishment back then. Oh, God, remember Russell?
Marshall: Nice monkey suit, Russell.
Russel: Come on, guys.
Marshall: Oh, I'm sorry, I can't hear you with that corporate noose around your neck. And don't even try showing up to the drum circle this weekend.
Ted: Oh, hey. You guys seen Russell? I'm supposed to drive him to his mom's funeral.
Robin: I wish I knew you guys back then. You know why? Because you can't kick a story in the nuts.
Lily: Hey, we're still those people. One of these days, Marshall's going to quit his job and go to work for the NRDC, and save the world, right, baby?
Marshall: Absotively. But let's just remember, I mean, nobody's the same as they were in college. You know, it's like, I wear a suit to work every day.
Lily: Well, yeah, but you wear it ironically, like Ted's fanny pack.
Ted: Next time we go to Great Adventure, you're carrying your own sunblock.
Lily: Ooh! I love this exhibit. One time when I was a kid, this room was closed for cleaning, so I snuck under the rope.
Barney: Wow, that's pretty cool. When I was a kid, I knocked down the blue whale.
Marshall: Okay, the giant blue whale hanging from the ceiling?
Barney: I was six. My uncle Jerry brought me here for the day. He said, "Don't touch anything". To a kid. That's like someone telling us "Don't look at that girl's perky and impossibly symmetrical knockers."
Robin: Not bad.
Barney: So, naturally, I snapped the rib off a triceratops, blahbity-blahbity-blue, I knocked down the whale. I'm surprised security didn't stop me on the way in.
snap off 折る
Robin: Well, I'm sure they don't remember. I mean, it's been like 30 years since that completely made-up story didn't happen.
Barney: It happened. And these people don't forget. This is not the Natural Stuff That Happened No More Than Five Minutes Ago Museum. Huh?
Arthur: Marshall, Barney, there you are. I want you to meet an old friend of mine from Exeter, George Van Smoot.
George: But you can, and should, call me The Captain.
Marshall: The Captain?
Barney: The Captain?
Arthur: Back in school we met during a production of Guys and Dolls. The Captain was Nathan Detroit to my assistant stage manager. Marshall and Barney here, are the future of Goliath National Bank.
George: Well, ahoy.
Marshall: Ahoy, The Captain.
Arthur: The Captain pretty much paid for this entire shindig.
George: Please, enjoy yourselves, have fun, but don't touch anything.
Marshall: Thank you, The Captain.
Barney: Challenge accepted.
Lily: Wow. "The future of Goliath National Bank"?
Marshall: I know, it's so, uh... You know, I totally forgot to tell you, but, um, the other day, Arthur offered me a five-year contract.
Lily: Oh, well, don't turn him down here in public. I broke up with Scooter at the prom. Right before the picture, too. So whatever you do, don't tell him here tonight, 'cause...
Marshall: I think I'm going to say yes.
Barney: Ah, that's the stuff.
Robin: I didn't realize you were small potatoes. And to be clear, I am referring to your testicles.
small potatoes くだらない人
Barney: Impressive. Try this on for size.
Robin: You want to dance? Let's dance.
Barney: I live for the dance.
Robin: Get... your other hand... off my ass.
Barney: Sorry, sorry.
Lily: What do you mean, you're going to say yes?
Marshall: I-I want to keep working at GNB.
Lily: But I thought that you...
Ted: Guys, guys, guys? Architecture fun fact: If you stand right here, and you whisper, a person all the way across the other end of the room hears it like you're standing right next to them. It's one of the most sophisticated pieces of acoustical design in the world. Watch. Diarrhea. Right? Right?
Lily: But a five-year contract. I thought you hated GNB.
Marshall: Look, I don't hate all of it. Tonight's fun. Take a look around. I mean, this is pretty high-class.
Ted: Poo-poo. Poo-poo platter. Zoey?
Ted: Well, well, well.
Zoey: You have got to be kidding me.
Ted: So, what are we protesting tonight? Rising cost of jet fuel? The government's oppressive top hat and monocle tax?
protest 抗議する oppressive 厳しすぎる top hat 上流階級の monocle 片眼鏡
Zoey: And what are you doing here? Oh, right. Beautiful old building... you're here to knock it down. Can I finish my drink first?
George: Darling, there you are.
Zoey: Ted, this is my husband.
Ted: Yeah, old stuff's great.
Robin: Mmm. Ah, this Scotch is good. How's your drink?
Barney: This is ridiculous. We are two grown adults standing among the greatest collection of natural artifacts in the Western hemisphere, and look at what we're doing.
Robin: You're right.
Barney: Want to go touch a bunch of stuff?
Robin: Yeah, I do.