Narator: Okay, now I got to back up all the way to the beginning to tell you the me and Robin part of the story.
Narator: We were expecting my parents at any minute.
Ted: One last thing about my mom. She grills every single one of my girlfriends about when we're gonna get married and have kids.
One last thing 最後にもう一つ grill じろじろ見る 質問攻めにする
Robin: But this is the first time she's meeting me.
Ted: Doesn't matter. And you'll know it's coming when she mentions my cousin Stacy six kids in five years. The woman's basically a ride at a water park.
Robin: But I don't want to get married and have kids. What am I supposed to say?
Ted: You know what? You're an adult with perfectly valid opinions. You shouldn't have to apologize for them.
Robin: I'm gonna lie.
Ted: I would.
Lily: Thanks again for letting me have the U2 box set.
Marshall: I know how important it is to you.
Ted's mother: I talked to Aunt Caroline the other day. Stacy's pregnant again.
Ted: Oh, good for her.
Ted's mother: So, dear...
Robin: Oh, boy.
Ted's mother: Tell us what it's like being a journalist.
Robin: I'm just not ready.
Ted's mother: Okay. No pressure.
Robin: Oh. Uh, I thought you, um... It's great.
Ted's mother: Good. Focus on your job now, because your career clock is ticking. There's time for marriage and kids and all that other stuff later.
Barney: Ooh, a piano!
Ted: You lucked out with my mom last night, huh? What a relief, right?
luck out 幸運に恵まれる What a relief あぁ、ホッとした〜
Robin: Oh, absolutely. Whew, what a relief it is to know I'm the one girlfriend your mom doesn't want you to have kids with.
Robin: I mean, did she really think that your college girlfriend Cheryl would pop out attractive children? 'Cause I've seen pictures, and, I'm sorry, that girl had a brow ridge like a caveman.
Ted: Come on, she was just frowning under direct light. And besides, that's not even what I liked about her. It was her... It's not important.
frown 眉をひそめる direct light 直射日光
Barney: What happened to Marshall and Lily?
Ted: They've been fighting lately. They're probably off somewhere going at it.
Waitress: More coffee?
Ted's mother: Oh, no, thank you. Isn't she sweet?
Robin: Well, if she's so sweet, maybe she should have Ted's babies.
Ted's mother: Excuse me?
Lily: Just a minute.
Marshall: Maybe less.
Ted's mother: Robin, dear, did I say something to upset you?
Robin: Why don't you want me to have your grandkids?
Ted's mother: Do you want to have my grandkids?
Robin: No! I mean, I don't know. I just... I want you to want me to want to have your grandkids. And you should. I'm a genetic gold mine. No family history of diabetes or heart disease. Everyone has nonporous teeth and perfect eyesight. I had one schizophrenic uncle but even he had perfect vision. Which was unfortunate for the people around the bell tower he was in, but still he was a very fine man, and...
Genetic Gold Mine A person with no genetic flaws, the kind of person who would have good children. diabetes 糖尿病 nonporous 小穴のない schizophrenic 統合失調症患者
Marshall: Excuse me. Sorry. Didn't know that there was a line.
Lily: Marshall, your zipper.
Ted's mother: Robin, it's not that I don't want grandkids. It's just I don't think anyone should make the mistake of getting married too young.
Robin: Why do you say that? I mean, you got married pretty young. That wasn't a mistake. Was it?
Ted's mother: Well... Okay, there's something you don't know...
Lily: I wish your face would melt off.
Marshall: I wish your eyeballs would explode.
Ted: I'm gonna kill him.
Robin: I don't care how unpleasant it is, you have to talk to him.
Ted's mother: Not now.
Robin: Okay, if you don't, I will.
Ted's mother: Robin...!
Ted's father: Oh, gosh, let me help you pick those up, sweetheart.
Ted: Sweetheart? Sweetheart?! The only sweetheart in your life should be the woman you married 30 years ago, not the waitress at the bar last night and not this clumsy floozy! (To the waitress) I'm sorry, you're not a floozy. I'm upset, I don't know what I'm saying. But stay away from my dad.
clumsy 不器用な floozy 身持ちの悪い女
Ted's mother: Ted, what are you talking about?
Ted: Dad? You, uh, want to tell Mom what happened at the bar last night?
Ted's father: Okay. I hooked up with a waitress.
Ted's mother: Oh.
Ted's mother: I mean, oh! Oh! Ooh! We're going to have a serious talk about this when we get home, Al. Oh, ooh!
Ted: Serious talk? Mom, what...? He was kissing another woman. Don't you care?
Ted's mother: Ted, we weren't quite sure how to tell you this...
Ted's father: Your mother and I are divorced.
Ted: What do you mean you're divorced? Since when?
Ted's mother: Oh, gosh, it's been about nine months now.
Ted's father: Closer to ten, I think.
Ted's mother: Time flies.
Ted: So ten months ago, you just up and decided to get divorced without telling me?
Ted's mother: No, it wasn't a snap decision.
snap decision 即断、見切り発車
Ted's father: We'd been separated almost two years.
Ted: How could you not tell me this?!
Ted's mother: We meant to, it just never seemed like the right time.
Ted: So last Christmas...?
Ted's father: We talked about telling you kids then, but it didn't seem very Christmasy.
Ted: I got you a tandem bike.
Ted's father: Oh, it didn't go to waste. Your mother and Frank ride it all the time.
Ted: Who the hell is Frank?!
Ted's father: Oh, great guy. I actually set them up. You remember Dr. Muchnik. He did your braces.
brace 即断、見切り発車 brace 歯列矯正装置
Ted: Okay, my head's about to explode, and I don't want to get it all over everyone's waffles, so I am leaving.
Ted's mother: Teddy bear, oh...
Barney: You know, he mentioned he was divorced last night. I totally spaced on that. Ooh, no line at the omelet station.
Spaced out on すっかり忘れる
Marshall: Lily... I'm sorry that I said all those things.
Lily: Me, too.
Marshall: I just find it really confusing to be around you right now.
Lily: It's the same for me. I think we're probably both better off trying to keep some distance for a while.
Marshall: Yeah, I think you're right. Are you wearing a push-up bra?
Lily: Did you Mystic Tan your calves?
Marshall: I withdraw the question.
withdraw the question 質問を撤回する
Ted's father: We're sorry we didn't say anything about the divorce.
Ted's mother: It was wrong not to tell you.
Ted: Thank you.
Ted's father: But listen, don't tell your sister.
Ted's mother: It would just upset her.
Ted: No, this is ridiculous! We have to start talking about stuff, and not just baseball.
Ted's father: Indians won today on a walk-off double.
walk-off single サヨナラヒット、決勝打
Ted: Against the Red Sox? Boy, that's a big win. No. No. No. We're not gonna blow past this. I mean, I don't even know who you people. I don't even know how you met.
I'm just gonna blow past it. それは流すことにするわ。
Ted's father: I never told you how I met your mother?
Ted's father: Oh, great story.
Ted: That's it? That's what passes for communication in our family? Man, when I have kids, and I tell them how I met their mother, I'm gonna tell them everything, the whole damn story.
Ted's father: I think it was an Irish bar.
Ted: I just, I don't... I don't understand. You seemed so happy. When I was growing up, you seemed so... What happened?
Ted's father: We just realized we're very different people.
Ted's mother: Your father's kind of a head-in-the-clouds romantic, and I'm much more down to earth.
Ted: So? Robin and I are like that. That doesn't mean anything.
Ted's father: I wanted kids. And your mother... also wanted kids.
Ted: Robin and I have different views on families. We're not about to break up because of it.
Ted's mother: On some level, I always knew. I didn't even want to go out with him in the beginning. But he spent months badgering me until I finally gave in.
On some level ある程度 badger にしつこく言う give in 負けを認める、降参する
Ted's father: Well, when you don't connect on that many fundamental levels, it's only a matter of time before you realize you're not meant to be together.
Ted's mother: But we love Robin.
Ted's father: Absolutely. Meeting you was the highlight of my trip. Well, second highlight.
Ted's mother: We'll see you inside.
Ted's father: Sorry.
Ted: I know.
Robin: They love me! Back inside, later.
Ted's mother: So we are definitely going to try and communicate more.
Ted's father: From now on, full disclosure.
Ted: Good. Good, I think it'll be really good for the family. By the way, how's Grandma? She hasn't returned my last couple calls.
Ted's mother: I'm gonna get some juice.
Ted: No. No.
Ted's father: You missed a great game last night. Real squeaker.