Ted: Just tell me what the hell is wrong with her already.
Marshall: Okay. You want to know?
Marshall: You want to shatter this beautiful illusion you've created for yourself? Fine. Here it is. Cathy talks... a lot.
Ted: Oh, come on. That's not true.
Robin: Ted. Really, really think about that dinner we all just had together.
Narrator: And I did.
Ted: So, what's everyone getting?
Cathy: Well, I can't decide. Which sounds better, chicken or lasagna? I like chicken. I like lasagna. I like them both, but I really like pork. A lot of people don't eat pork, and maybe it's because of that movie Babe or something. But that was funny. He was a talking pig and he was like "Bah, Ram, Ewe!" What-what if there was a sorority, "Bah, Ram, Ewe?" I'd totally rush it. ...And so I named him Dr. Seuss! Lorax is a funny word.
sorority 女子学生クラブ Dr. Seuss' The Lorax ロラックスおじさんの秘密の種
Robin: Lasagna! Just get the lasagna!
Cathy: Oh, you guys just got a new place. How many bedrooms is it? I would love to have an extra bedroom, because I would put a Stairmaster in there. But you guys should get a convertible sofa. Or a futon. Futons are great. Or what about one of those Murphy beds? Who invented the Murphy bed? Was it a guy named Murphy? Oh, my God. Do you guys remember that show Murphy Brown? That was a funny show. She had a new assistant every episode. ...and it was like half an hour before I realized he wasn't even on the phone anymore! Isn't that hysterical?
futon マットレス hysterical 感情的になった
Lily: Two! It's two bedrooms!
Cathy: Hey, do you guys like cannolis? Because I know this place and it's in the South Bronx and you wouldn't expect it, but they have the best cannolis in town.
Narrator: And just like that, the illusion was shattered.
Ted: She just never shuts up, does she?
Robin: She didn't stop to swallow her food. I was scared for her. I didn't want her to choke. At first.
Narrator: So kids, this girls I was dating would not stop talking. Can you imagine how awful that is?
Cathy: I'm so glad that we're staying here tonight, because the thing about going out is you have so...
Cathy: Do you own a wok? 'Cause that's really how...
Cathy: Don't you just love autumn? Today I'm dressed for... Oh, my God. The sweetest thing.
Cathy: And I know this great place where we can go. They have guys and girls clothes. We could both shop at the same time. And a lot of times boyfriends and girlfriends... Hey! Why are you running so fast?
Ted: Well, thank you, pal. You and your little friends, you just had to tell me. You just had to give in to my incessant begging.
Marshall: You said that you wanted to know.
Ted: I didn't want to know!
Marshall: You said you wanted to know!
Ted: Well, I didn't know I didn't want to know! You knew. And you know me. And you should have known I didn't want to know! You know?
Marshall: I'm sorry we told you. I'm surprised she didn't tell you herself at some point. There's only a finite combination of words in the English language.
Ted: Well, you could have let me enjoy it a little longer. She's got all these other great qualities. She's smart. She's caring. She loves animals...
Marshall: You know how to teach her a lesson? Buy her a parrot. Oh, come on. I'm sorry that we told you, okay? It's part of being in a relationship. Eventually, you get used to these annoying little things that bug you at first.
Ted: Yeah, I guess. I mean, you got used to Lily's loud chewing, right?
Marshall: Lily doesn't chew loudly.
Ted: Dude... Come on. This isn't news. Why do you think I call her "Chewbacca"?
Marshall: I assumed because she's loyal, wears shiny belts and I resemble a young Harrison Ford.
Ted: Think about it.
Marshall: Oh, man, honestly, dude, that's the meanest thing you've ever done to me.
Ted: I really thought you knew. We had ribs the other night. It sounded like Jurassic Park.
Marshall: Ha-ha-ha. You know what? It doesn't matter.
Narrator: But it did.
Marshall: Say, what's in that cereal besides dry twigs and small animal bones?
Lily: What's that supposed to mean?
Marshall: Lily, I love you, but honest to God, when you eat, it sounds like a garbage disposal full of drywall screws.
disposal 処分 drywall ドライウォール
Lily: What's the matter with you? We've been together ten years, and you're saying this now?
Marshall: Well, I never noticed it before until...
Lily: Until what?
Lily: Can you believe Ted? What a lame thing to say, that I'm a loud chewer.
Robin: Yeah, that's crazy. Maybe enough with the pretzels.
Lily: Oh, my God, do I really chew that loudly?
Robin: No, no, no. Okay, now that you pointed it out, maybe it does sound slightly like someone put a screwdriver in a pencil sharpener, but in a cute way.
Lily: This is all Ted's fault. Oh, like he's so perfect, Mr. Corrector.
Robin: What do you mean?
Lily: Oh, come on. You dated the guy for a year and you never noticed that most of what Ted says is correcting you.
Robin: Hey, can you hand me a Kleenex?
Ted: Actually, Kleenex is a brand. This is a facial tissue.
Robin: Oh, my God, is Frankenstein gonna kill that little girl?
Ted: Uh, Dr. Frankenstein isn't in this scene. That's Frankenstein's monster.
Robin: That literally blew my mind.
literally 文字通りに blow one's mind 恍惚感を覚えさせる
Robin: Oh, my God, you're right. That is so annoying.
Lily: Isn't it?
Robin: Where are those pretzels from, Ace Hardware?