Narrator: Is what Marshall should have said.
Marshall: Another couple? No! We want it. Sell it to us. We'll give you so much more money.
Lily: Oh Marshall, can I talk to you? Marshall, I just... I don't know if now is the right time to buy.
Marshall: But we're not doing this for now, we're doing this for our future. Can't you imagine starting a family here?
Lily: Oh Persephone! Oh Daphne! These'll be perfect additions to our upcoming mother-daughter exhibit at the Met.
persephone ペルセポネ daphne ダフネ mother-daughter 母娘のつながり Met メトロポリタン美術館
Marshall: Looks great girls. Who wants crapes of?
Girls: Merci papa.
The estate agent: So... What do you guys think?
Lily: I love it, but Marshall, I should have told you this long time ago. We can't afford to buy an apartment because I have too much credit card debt. I am so sorry.
Narrator: Is what she should have said.
Lily: I love it. Let's get it. Can we charge it?
Ted: To Lily and Marshall and their momentous step forward into adulthood.
All: Cheers! Chug! chug! chug! chug! drink it! yes! Well done. Nice! yeah!
The waitress: Anything else?
Marshall: Yes! I've been staring at that thing for years. Wendy, bring me the comically large bottle of champagne.
Wendy: Really? Are you sure? It's never been refrigerated. And I think at some point there was a fish in it.
Marshall: Honey, once you've made the sale, stop selling.
Wendy: All right, but you guys have to help me carry it.
Marshall, Ted, Barney: All right, let's do it. Let's do it.
Lily: I know what you're thinking. I should tell Marshall the truth. I've got the whole thing figure out. We'll apply for the loan under Marshall's name, and he'll never need to know. And then in the meantime, I'll slowly work down my debt, right after I furnish the apartment. I saw this amazing leather sofa today.
Robin: You should be a reality show. nice! nice!
Marshall: Wait! That cork is the size of a softball and you're pointing it directly at Wendy the waitress's face.
Narrator: Is what he should have said.
Narrator: Now if you are thinking about buying an apartment, it's always good to check the place out at night.
Barney: Welcome to my humble abode.
humble 質素な abode 住居
The girl: This place is so nice.
Barney: Ah, make yourself at home. Please get comfortable. If you see something you like, just take it.
The girl: Who are these people?
Barney: Uh... That's my parents.
The girl: They're Asian.
Barney: Yeah! They're a chinese couple that wanted a white baby, it works both ways. Cookie?
it works both ways どっちにもうまく作用する
The girl: Wow! Did you make those?
Barney: You got me. My sisters taught me how to bake and how to listen.
You got me まいったね。/ やられたね。
The girl: Wow, I feel so at home here.
Barney: I'm glad. Sometimes, I don't. A place like this really needs a lady of the house. I know it's early to be thinking of you as... Oh, God, I'm freaking you out, aren't I? It's just you make me feel so safe. I didn't...
Narrator: The next day, Lily and Marshall went to the mortgage broker to get a loan.
Marshall: Hey, uh, can we get this in singles? Before we get the apartment I want to put in a kiddie pool and swim around in it naked.
Bank Employee: Great, that is great.
Marshall: Thank you.
Bank Employee: Okay! All right, back to business. All right, MRS Aldrin, I'm going to need your social as well.
Lily: What? Why? I mean, you already have Marshall's.
Bank Employee: Yes, but since you're a married couple, you'll be applying for a joint loan, so.
Lily: Well, can we just go ahead and do it in my husband's name? He's the head of the household. He earns the big bucks. I mean, can women even own property?
Marshall: Go ahead, just give him your social.
Lily: Okay my... my social is, uh... 1glmmdhgj2.
Bank Employee: Got it! Let's see what kind of rate I can get you 2.
Marshall: Under six percent, under six percent, please.
Bank Employee: There we go, Congratulation you've been approved for a loan at 18%.
Marshall: No way. That-that can't be right.
Bank Employee: You're lucky to be getting mortgage.
Lily: Let's get out of here, Marshall.
Marshall: Hold it, I- I don't understand. Did we do something wrong or...?
Bank Employee: You have quite a bit of debt.
Marshall: My student loans. Great. I thought we were friends. You know what, it's fine to penalize me for trying to get an education and bud a career, but I will not let you deprive my beautiful wife of her dream home just because I...
penalize ペナルティーを科す deprive 奪う
Bank Employee: Okay, actually, it's because of your wife's credit card debt.
Lilly: Marshall, there's something I have to tell you, and I want you to hear it from me first.
Robin: Okay, let me get this straight. You just snuck this girl into some stranger's apartment?
let me get this straight はっきり言わせてね
Barney: Yeah, we spent the night.
Barney: Hey, look at you.
Girl: I'm wearing your bathrobe. I hope you don't mind.
Barney: The only thing missing from that bathrobe are your initials.
Girl: My mom's gonna be in town next week. It's okay if she stays with us?
Barney: Only if she sleeps in the bed and I sleep on the couch.
Girl: You're so sweet.
Barney: I love you. There, I said it and I'm not taking it back.
Girl: Oh my god! I love you too. I'm finally not the first one to say it!
Barney: How about you get in the shower, and I will make us some waffles.
Barney: Works at every time.
Robin: Wait. That time that you offered to walk my dogs when I went to visit my dad in Vancouver...
Robiin: Is that why my Yorkie trembled for like a week after I got back?
Barney: Yeah. That little guy saw some stuff I'm not proud of.
Ted: There was a fight here.
Robin: What do you mean?
Ted: Whenever Marshall and Lily have a big argument, they always leave a trail of evidence all over the apartment.
Robin: Oh, God here we go. He had a detective club as a kid.
Ted: HUm the Mosby boys cracked a lot of big cases.
Robin: The Mosby boys? You mean you and your sister.
Ted: We solved the mystery of the missing retainer.
Robin: Let me guess, it was in the garbage.
Ted: Why are you like this? Anyway, this is serious. I know Lily and Marshall. All the tell tale signs are here. Like this.
Robin: A water bott.
Barney: Don't touch the evidence. I got your back partner.
Ted: It's not satiny water bottle. Notice the label is peed off.