on my birthday
Narrator: So the next night I took Natalie out to dinner. To do the mature thing.
Ted: Look, uh, Natalie there's something I have to say.
Natalie: Oh wait, wait. There's something I have to say first. Today at work, I had not one, not two, but three birthday cakes, so tonight. can we just skip the cake?
Ted: Today is your birthday?
Natalie: Yeah, no that's okay... I wasn't telling anyone about it.
Ted: Today's your birthday! I... I didn't get you anything.
Natalie: Oh, it's okay. You know you've already given me the best present of all. I can trust again.
Ted: You're welcome. Oh, so much more wine.
Robin: Henry, as New York's oldest handsome cab driver, you've seen quite a lot.
Robin: In your past 60 years on the job what is your most exciting memory?
Barney: Ahh! This is it.
Lily: Oh, boy, here we go.
Barney: Everyone, everyone... If I may direct your attention to the television. You're about to see something... amazing.
direct your attention に集中する
Henry: And them, in '72, Mickey Mantle rode my cab for the fourth time.
Barney: Come on, baby... bring it home.
bring it home さぁ、どんどん盛り上げて行こうよ！
Henry: But the most exciting moment, that would have to be this one, right now.
Henry: Look at me, I'm on TV. I never thought I'd have my story told. Thank you, Miss Robin Scherbatsky.
Henry: Thank you.
Narrator: And right then, Aunt Robin realized how important her job truly was.
Robin: It's an honor to tell your story, Henry.
Robin: You know, Metro News One may not be number one in viewer ship. But this reporter takes pride in... Whoa!! OH! Oh, my god! I'm covered in horse crap! It's in my hair!! Oh my, ow... ow my knee.
viewer ship 視聴者
Marshall: You planned that?
Barney: No, Marshall. That was beyond my wildest dreams
Natalie: So, if you ever come to Alabama, my mom throws these huge crawfish boils and she's just dying to meet you, by the way.
crawfish ザリガニ I'm dying to meet you 君に会いたくてたまらない
Ted: Look, Natalie, there's something I have to say and there's no good way to say it. I wanna break up. I don't think you're the one for me. I don't wanna waste your time because I really like you. I wanna do right by you, and I think the best way to do that is just to be honest. I'm sorry. Just let it out. They're only tears. Aah!
Just let it out 吐き出しちゃおう！
Natalie: I'm not the one for you?
Ted: I'm sorry. I just thought the mature thing to do would be...
Natalie: It's my birthday!
Ted: Yes, I know I didn't realize that it was...
Natalie: It's my birthday and you're telling me I'm not the one for you?
Ted: It's really not such a big deal. I mean it's the odds. It's like you lost the lottery.
It's really not such a big deal 大したことじゃない odds 確率 lottery 宝くじ
Natalie: Oh, so dating you is like winning the lottery?
Ted: No, no, no. I didn't mean that.
Natalie: Okay, So what's the problem?
Ted: It's... I can't explain it.
Ted: It's... ineffable.
Natalie: I'm not "F-able"?
F-able = fuckable セックスできる
Ted: No, no, no, no. Ineffable, ineffable means it can't be explained.
Natalie: Oh, so I'm stupid?
Ted: Oh, god what's going on?
Natalie: Okay, "what's going on" is, you broke my heart over my answering machine... on my birthday, waited three years for me to get over you. Tracked me down, begged me to go out with you again only so you could dump me three weeks later. Again on my birthday!
get over 乗り越える track down 追い詰める beg 懇願する go out with 交際する
Ted: No, it's... it's not like that. I'm just... it's, it's, it's.
Ted: I'm just like super busy right now.
Narrator: Remember when Natalie said.
Natalie: I have my Krav Maga class in half an hour.
Narrator: Turns out Krav Maga is not a kind of yoga. It's a form of guerilla street fighting developed by the Israeli army.
Waiter: This is compliments of those two gentlemen at the bar.
Guy#1: My knee!
Guy#2: It's in my hair!
Barney: But isn't it nice to know that people are watching?
isn't it nice to 良かったじゃん
Marshall: Oh, my god. Are you all right?
Lily: What happened to you?
Ted: Told the truth, turns out the truth has a mean round house kick.
Marshall: Oh, man.
Lily: Oh, well you did the right thing. I'm proud of you.
Ted: I'm bleeding internally.
Barney: Hey, Ted, you know what always picks me up when I'm down? Other people's misfortune. You missed something so amazing.
pick me up 元気づける misfortune 不運、逆境、災難
Robin: Please can we please have one person in this whole bar who didn't see it?
Lily: Are you okay?
Ted: I really thought I was going the good way this time. I guess there is no good way. Sometimes no matter how hard you try to do the right thing, you just end up flat on your back flailing around in a big pile of horse crap!
no matter how どんなに〜であろうとも pile of 山ほどの
Robin: You saw it?
Ted: My phone gets the internet now! It's okay, grow up.
Narrator: And that's how it ended with Natalie. No happily ever after. Just a whole lot of hurt. And just like that all those wonderful memories were replaced. By this one
just like that そんな具合に
Narrator: But you know, bad as that night was... within a year Natalie was married. With three beautiful children. So that's the upside of her. Sometimes it happens for a reason.
Son: Wow, so you got beat up by a girl?
Narrator: Is that all you're taking away from this story?
take away 取り上げる
Son: You got beat up by a girl?
Narrator: Hey, she knew Krav Maga.