Marshall: Holy crap, the magical Christmas season is upon us. And thank God we don't pay for utilities.
is upon us が到来する utilities 公共料金
Lily: Merry Christmas! What's in the box?
Marshall: Only the best present for the best girl ever. It took me all day to track it down.
Lily: I thought you were writing a paper.
Marshall: Ah, naw, I blew that off. I'll get an extension. School's not important. What is that pitter patter on the roof? Could it be the sound of an awesome Christmas story about to come down the chimney? Why, yes, it is.
naw ＝no blow off 取りやめる extension 公開講座 pitter patter パラパラと音を立てる
Marshall: It was supposed to arrive, like, five days ago, but then it got lost and rerouted. I checked two other branches, finally they told me it was here.
Women: Yeah, all I needed to know was the tracking number. Looks like it's headed out to our regional branch in Poughkeepsie.
Marshall: What?No, no, no, no,I need that package today.
Women: Listen, the truck already left five minutes ago so unless you want to run after it...
Marshall: Stop! Stop! Stop, please, stop. Stop. Stop the truck. I need a package on your truck. Can I please take a look in back?
Truck driver: Sure. But I gotta keep driving my route. I'm running behind.
run behind 予定時刻より遅れる
Truck driver: My bad.
Marshall: I'm okay. Hey, man, thanks for helping me make my fiancee's Christmas.
Truck driver: No problem. Too bad I can't deliver all these packages by the end of the day.
Marshall: Wait, so some people aren't going to get their gifts in time for Christmas?
Truck driver: Sadly, no.
Marshall: We delivered every single package on that truck. But I still have one package left to give. Yeah, I did. Merry Christmas. Open it, Baby.
Lily: Okay. Oh, my God. An Easy Bake Oven! I've wanted one of these ever since I was a little girl. In this exact model. I never told you that. How did you know?
Marshall: It's our first Christmas since we got back together. I want to get her something really special. So I'm getting her a jukebox.
Ted: Wow, that's a great gift.
Marshall: Not really. It's this big and it dispenses gum.
Ted: Oh, man, I know something you could get her that would blow her mind. Ready? Eight years ago...
Lily: When I was a kid, all I wanted was an Easy Bake Oven. I begged and I begged, but all I got was a stupid Lego set because my feminist mom didn't want me conforming to traditional gender roles.
Ted: Easy Bake Oven--that's what I'm going to call my van.
Ted: Dude... how was the concert?
Marshall: I couldn't find the outside.
Lily: I can't believe Ted remembered after all these years.
Marshall: Yeah, and after all that weed. Where is he anyway?
weed 雑草 喪章
Lily: Staten Island.
Marshall: Why? Staton island.
Ted: Okay, don't tell your mom, but I got you guys some presents.
kid: Like the gift of God's love?
Ted: No, dude, real presents.
Kid: Uncle Ted got us presents!
Stacy: That's okay, Ted, we'll just give them to charity.
Stacy: Uh, not you, Charity. I meant the less fortunate. Ted, how would you like to say grace tonight?
say grace 祈りをささげる
Ted: Uh, you know what, why don't you say it. I really wouldn't know what to say.
Charity: Why don't you recite your favorite passage of scripture.
recite 復唱する passage 一節、一句 scripture 聖書
Ted: That's a great idea, Charity. But, really, I don't know. I mean how do you choose your favorite passage? It's the Bible; there's so many... great ones... That one from Pulp Fiction's pretty cool. Ooh, I'll get it. Charity, I'm tapping you in.
Charity: Dear, Father, thank you for this day, and thank you for bringing this family together. Amen.
Stacy: Who is it, Ted?
Ted: Uh, it's... it's just, um, carolers.
Lily: I came here to apologize. I'm so sorry, Ted.
Ted: I accept. Give me the beer. it is so good to see you guys.
Lily: Are you coming home?
Ted: Totally. But first, Lily, I owe you an apology.
Lily: Oh, for the love of God, are you as sick of apologies as I am?
Lily: Can we just skip the apology and go straight to the forgiving?
Ted: Yes. And I promise, I will never ever call you a... you know, again.
Lily: That's okay. I was kind of a Grinch.
kid: What's a Grinch?
Ted: Nothing. It's something you shouldn't say.
Kid: Mom, what's a Grinch?
Both kids: Grinch, Grinch, Grinch...
Ted: Merry Christmas, everybody.
Marshall: Merry Christmas, Marshall.