ƒnƒCƒ‰ƒCƒg‚Í"Mr. Mosby, let's just cut right to the chase."

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How I met your mother ƒV[ƒYƒ“6yŒ´‘čzLandmarks

Narator: Kids, this is a story of landmarks. There are certain moments in life when you have to decide which things you can stand to see torn down, and which things you have to preserve, no matter what. Such a moment came for all of us in May of 2011, at a special meeting of the New York City Landmarks Preservation Commission, where the fate of The Arcadian would be decided once and for all.

once and for all ‚Ť‚Á‚Ď‚č‚Ć

Marshall: A symbol of strength and constancy, the stone lion of The Arcadian has watched over New Yorkers for generations. So remember: if the lion head stonework is regal, then tearing it down should be illegal. Well. Did you like that? All right, uh... We must make sure the lion is always there. Destroy The Arcadian? Oh, no, don't you dare. Yeah? Yeah? Okay. Try this one on for size... If you want New York's history at your beck and call...

constancy •s•Ď

Chairman: All right, thank you, Mr. Eriksen.

Marshall: I just have...

Chairman: We will now hear from the architect of the proposed GNB Tower, Ted Mosby. Now, uh, Mr. Mosby, let's just cut right to the chase. Do you think The Arcadian should be a landmark?...Okay, it's killing me. What rhymes with "beck and call?"

cut to the chase ƒYƒoƒŠ—v“_‚đŒž‚¤ beck and call Œž‚˘‚Č‚č‚É‚Č‚Á‚Ä

Marshall: Wrecking ball. Don't go swinging no wrecking ball.

Wrecking ball Œš•¨‰đ‘Ě—p‚Ě“S‹…

Audience: Ah...

Marshall: Thank you.

Chairman: Mr. Mosby, do you think The Arcadian should be a landmark? It's not a difficult question.

Narator: Actually, it a difficult question. Of course, had he asked me a few days earlier, I would have immediately said...

Ted: "Yes. The Arcadian should be a landmark. And then the crowd gasps. "Oh, my God! Did he really just say that? Oh, heavens! Oh, my stars! I must clutch my pearls!"

gaspl ƒnƒb‚Ć‘§‚đ‚Ě‚Ţ

Lily: So these things are generally attended by old Southern ladies?

Ted: Almost exclusively. But here's my point: If they ask GNB's chief architect... aka me... if The Arcadian should be a landmark, and I say "yes"?

exclusively ‚ŕ‚Á‚Ď‚ç

Marshall: That, no, that wasn't The Arcadian being destroyed; that was GNB's hopes of destroying The Arcadian. I'm sorry, I should have been more clear.

Zoey: Yeah. The Arcadian's gonna be all like...

Marshall: Nice.

Robin: I have a message from Barney.

Narator: Things between Barney and the rest of us had gotten a little frosty. First this happened.

frosty “€‚é‚悤‚Č

Zoey: Meet the new lawyer I hired to help save The Arcadian.

Narator: And then this happened.

Zoey: What kind of dirtbag doesn't stand by his best friends, but instead, sides with some self-righteous bitch with a pointless cause and a megaphone?!

Ted: Dude! That's my girlfriend. And ya know what? I'm on her side now, too.

Narator: Which led to this happening.

Zoey: Message from Barney? That's my cue to leave. Good night, guys. I love you.

Ted: Mmm. Love you, too.

Lily: All right, what's the message? 'Cause if it's another hypothetical yet eerily accurate drawing of my boobs...

accurate ¸–§‚Č

Robin: Yeah, I have that, too.

Lily: Damn it.

Robin: All right, here's the message. "Oh, hey, guys. Didn't see you there. I was too busy feelin' fine and..." Really? "Feelin' fine and gettin' some 'jine. You may have noticed the giant plate of hot wings in front of me. I know how much you love hot wings. Too bad someone bribed the kitchen to take them off the menu tonight. So, if you want some, you're going to have to come back to GNB. But hurry, this offer will be gone lickety-split. Do evil laugh." Oh, um... So, what are you turds up to?

lickety-split ‘S‘Ź—Í‚Ĺ

Marshall: Oh, we've got the big LPC meeting in two days. I have my whole presentation worked out. I just need to find a good rhyme to end on.

Ted: Why does it need to rhyme?

Marshall: If you end an argument with a rhyme, it's convincing all the time.

Lily: Yeah. It's why in our apartment: If you're a-hopin' to score, don't leave your socks on the floor.

Marshall: And she hasn't since.

Barney: Okay, okay. A couple of things. Lily, how'd I do?

Marshall: Nailed it.

Barney: Secondly, Ted, I'm sorry I said mean things about Zoey. Are you really going to walk away from this project just because you're mad at me?

say mean things about ˆÓ’nˆŤ‚Č‚ą‚Ć‚đŒž‚¤

Ted: It's not because I'm mad at you. Barney, The Arcadian was designed by a guy named John Clifford Larrabee. And even though he's been dead for half a century, it's my duty, architect to architect, to keep his work alive. Please tell me a little part of you understands.

Barney: I understand. Zoey has magic lady bits.

Ted: What?

Barney: Zoey's lady bits... are magic, and that's how she controls your mind. You see, every few hundred millennia, lady bits leap forward...

Lily: I know you're only just getting started, but this is already gross.

Barney: I once knew such a girl.

Barney: It was last call. In this very bar.

Barney: What...?! No... What?!...No... What?!

Robin: Um... thank you for, um, not using a first name in that story.

Ted: Barney, this is about the building.

Barney: Come on. This is so about the girl.

Ted: Okay, fine. It's about the girl! I am doing this for Zoey! I'm in love with her. Look, I know it's early, but there is a very good chance Zoey might be the mother of my children. So, in addition to doing this for John Clifford Larrabee, I'm also doing this for Luke and Leia.

Lily: Wait. She's gonna let you name your kids Luke and Leia?

Ted: Not if I knock down her favorite building, she isn't. Barney, I'm sorry.

Barney: Oh, you're not sorry now, Ted Mosby. But you will be. You... will... be. That's how you do an evil laugh. Ciao for now.

Narator: Now, kids, you remember Arthur Hobbs, Barney and Marshall's old boss at GNB? Well, Arthur was going through a divorce and taking it kind of hard.

Barney: Hi, Arthur. Everything okay?

Arthur: No, everything's not okay. My stupid wife got custody of Tugboat. God, I should have kept her hidden in a cage in the basement.

Barney: Isn't that animal cruelty?

cruelty Žc“‚ł

Arthur: I'm talking about my wife.

Barney: Oh. That's fine, then. So listen, you know Ted, the architect?

Arthur: Yeah, I know your friend Ted.

Barney: So, if Ted stood up at that big meeting tomorrow and said that he thought The Arcadian should be a landmark... You wouldn't just fire him, would you? Right? You wouldn't just... You wouldn't just... yeah...

Arthur: No, Barney. I wouldn't just fire him. I'd also fire you.

Barney: Come again for Big Fudge?

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