Robin: Thank you.
Kevin: I can't believe this. I'm sitting here with a beautiful woman I just met eating at my favorite restaurant. Sweet.
Robin: It's a nice place. It's good to know the future has ribs.
Kevin: In the future food will most likely be served in gel-cap form. Plus cows will probably have died out by then... or be our leaders.
Robin: Just a second.
Barney: Time's running out, Scherbatsky. Last chance for the lemon law.
Robin: Leave me alone.
Barney: 4:56, 4:57, 4:58.
Robin: We're only just getting to know each other.
Barney: Say I'm right and this could all be over. This could be your call from the hospital.
Kevin: Let me guess, there's been a crazy accident and you have to go.
Robin: No, I would never do that. I don't wanna go anywhere. I'm all yours.
Kevin: Look, if you're a hooker, I don't have a lot of money.
Marshall: That was awesome.
Ted: I know.
Marshall: Do it again.
Ted: OK, but this time, jump up and I'll swipe your legs.
Ted: Look. Here's why I should get the place. You and Lily, you get to be married. What do I get, right? I get to be unmarried, alone, minus two roommates. And on top of that I could be homeless. Does that seem fair?
Here's why その理由はこうです。というのは。だって。 on top of that その上に、それに加えて
Marshall: Oh, boo-freakin-hoo.
Marshall: Woe is me. I'm not married yet. My ovaries are shrinking. Ted, if you wanted to be married by now you would be but you're not. And you know why? Because you're irrationally picky. You're easily distracted and you're utterly anhedonic.
Woe 悩みの種 苦悩 ovaries 卵巣 shrinking 縮小［減少・目減り］する、先細りの irrationally 非合理的に、いわれなく、見境なく picky えり好みする distracted 取り乱した 考えがまとまっていない utterly すっかり anhedonic 快感喪失の
Marshall: Anhedonic. It means you can't enjoy anything.
Ted: The hell I can't. I'm enjoying this.
Marshall: I know, this rules.
this rules これ最高！
Marshall: Hey, I'm sorry I took the swords down.
Ted: That's OK, it led to this totally rad sword fight, didn't it?
Marshall: Yeah it did.
Marshall: You remember when we first got these swords?
Ted: It was the day we moved in.
Ted: Congratulations, Marshall. We live in an apartment with swords on the wall.
Marshall: List of lifelong dreams, you're not half as long. Crap. I'm missing one of the screws for this table
lifelong dream 生涯の夢
Ted: Just use this wood glue, it'll hold.
Robin: Oh God, I'll be right there.
Robin: Kevin, I'm so sorry. I have to go. My friend's been stabbed with a sword.
Kevin: Hab slosi quch! You have no honor. You know, if you felt this way you could have just been upfront.
feel this way about 〜についてこのように思う be upfront about について率直である
Robin: No, I swear that was a real call. I just...Oh forget it.
Marshall: I stabbed Lily. I stabbed my fiancee.
Ted: Come on, Marshall, do you really think she's still your fianceee I'm kidding. Hey, I think you guys should have the apartment.
Marshall: But you fought so bravely for it.
Ted: I wasn't fighting for the apartment. I was fighting for...I don't know...for everything to stay the way it is. But I'm not gonna get that, so, seriously, take the place, it's yours.
stay the way のままで
Robin: Is she OK?
Marshall: They're just patching her up. She's gonna be fine.
patch up 応急処置をする
Barney: So get this, I was on a date with this girl, Jackie.
Barney: What? You said she's fine. So, anyway, I was on date with this girl, Jackie.
Barney: Wow, Jackie, you make a really great first impression. I have a feeling that tonight you might end up being Jackie.
Jackie: Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to lemon law you.
Barney: It's out there, it's a thing. The lemon law is a thing. Damn, I should have called it Barney's law.
Robin: But you're totally...
Ted: Just let him have this one.
Doctor: All set. She said she'd like to see the knights of the poorly constructed round table?
All set 準備ができている状態< poorly 元気がない、具合が悪い constructe 組み立てる a Knight of the Round Table 円卓の騎士
Marshall: That's us.
Lily: A sword fight?
Marshall,Ted: Sorry, Lily.
Lily: On Monday, I'm gonna have to tell my kindergarten class who I teach not to run with scissors that my fiancee ran me through with a frickin' broad sword.
Marshall: Well, just to be fair, it didn't go all the way through.
go all the way through 最初から最後までやり通す
Lily: I'm sorry, is this a discussion of the degree to which you stabbed me?
degree to which 〜 is affected 〜が影響を受けている程度
Marshall: You're right. I'm sorry. We were fighting to see who gets the apartment. And I won.
Ted: Uh, you didn't win. I gave it to you.
Marshall: Uh, you know, if I tried...
Lily: Wait wait wait wait wait. I don't want that apartment. It's a boy apartment. It's full of swords and videogames, and kind of smells like dude. It's fine for now, but when we get married, I wanna start a new life with you in a new place.
Marshall: Gonna miss the old place.
Lily: I will too. We're not getting married for like a year.
Ted: Yeah, that's Future Marshall's problem. Let that guy deal with it.
deal with 取り組む、解決しようとする
Lily: Maybe it's the massive blood loss talking but I'm starving.
Marshall: Let's go get some dinner.
Lily: I know just the place.
Ted: Chinese restaurant, I still don't believe it.
Lily: I told you. OK, a toast.
Lily: Life is full of changes. One day you have an apartment, the next day it's a house of dumplings. But the important stuff doesn't change. To the important stuff.
Everyone: Here here. Cheers
Barney: And to the lemon law.
Lily: And by the way, I bought these glasses. I bought them at Ikea. These are my glasses.
Marshall: I love this song. I haven't heard this in forever.
Lily: I'm pretty sure this is a mixed tape you made me in sophomore year.
Robin: Lily, your apartment makes the best Shanghai dumplings.
Marshall: I love you, Lily. Happy Valentine's Day 1998.